Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-07-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 7.0)
It is argued that permitting children to make their own choices on everday matters like as food, clothes and entertainment leads them towards prioritise their own preferences that can make them less cooperative in the future, while others believe that making own decisions play a crucial role in the overall growth of children because it boost their confidence. I will discuss both views and explain how it is significant for boosting self confidence.
On the one hand, allowing children to make their own decisions can promote a lack of co-operation. This is because when they get everything according to their choices, they make them unable to understand the importance of adjustment that sometimes everyone have to make in their lives. For example, many people these days especially young generation are more likely to force their parents to fulfil their wishes without taking care of their financial condition. As a result, they learn bad habits that can impact their lives. Therefore, I think that allowing children to make their choices can impact not only to children but also their parents due to inculcating bad habits in them.
On the other hand, encouraging to make own decisions in regular matters can help to develop self-esteem in the future. This happens because many children who is allowed by parents to make choices can develop self confidence that can encourge them to make better decisions in their lives related to career. For instance, many educated parents especially in developed nations allow their children to make own decisions about their lives are more likley to achieve success in career and get better opportiunities than those who are controlled by their parents. Consequentaly, parents should allow their children to make their own choices for developing self confidence in them.
In conclusion, there is no doubt that making own decisions in life can impact children's overall development by making them less cooperative, while it can hel to boost self esteem that play a vital role in a bright future of childre.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 7.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 7.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both viewpoints and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, though the development is somewhat repetitive. For instance, the argument about 'self-confidence' is mentioned in both the introduction and the second body paragraph without significant expansion. To reach a higher band, you should aim to provide more distinct, nuanced examples rather than repeating the same point. The position is consistent throughout, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main arguments presented in the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'For example', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there is occasional awkward phrasing, such as 'This happens because many children who is allowed by parents'. Improving the flow between sentences would enhance the overall coherence. The progression of ideas is generally clear, though the link between the two body paragraphs could be more sophisticated.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'cooperative', 'inculcating', and 'developed nations'. However, there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'everday', 'prioritise', 'encourge', 'opportiunities', 'Consequentaly') and some minor collocation issues, such as 'like as food' instead of 'such as food'. While these errors do not impede communication, they prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on accurate spelling and more precise word choices will help improve your score in this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are recurring grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'children who is allowed', 'everyone have to make') and preposition usage (e.g., 'impact not only to children'). Punctuation is generally functional, but the sentence structure occasionally feels repetitive. To improve, focus on ensuring that your subjects and verbs agree and practice using a wider variety of complex structures with greater accuracy to reduce the frequency of these minor errors.
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