Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often argued that giving confidence to the children to make their own choices in daily life such as food, clothes and entertainment will result in making mind set of individuals who only prioritize his or her wishes first. While other believe that it gives confidence and improve decision making ability of an individual.

Let's begin with the opinion of the people who confront that giving children the opportunity to make their own choices in their routine life will make them bit selfish. They will put their wishes first if they have any conflicts of interest. Although the children pick things for themselves but it also makes them learn multiple aspects of life. They will come to know which thing is good for them. While they don't think it also affects others in good or bad way.

On the other hand, it is opposed by some community members who have their own opinion which is quite enough to contradict the statement of the people who believe the children will be selfish. They have their own way of thinking and believed that giving children a free hand will boost their power of decision. If the children are encouraged to choose the things in routine life it helps them to learn other aspect of life as well.

I agree with the people who believe making decision in different matters will improve their decision making power. For instance my father helps me and support me in choosing my own clothes while shopping, helps me pick fruits for my self and also encouraged me to support other people. It helps me improve my decision making ability and I feel more confident and make decision without hesitation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For example, the argument regarding children becoming 'selfish' is mentioned but not fully explored or supported with strong reasoning. The explanation of the benefits of decision-making is also quite repetitive. To reach a higher band, you should aim to provide more detailed explanations and specific examples that illustrate the long-term consequences of these parenting styles, rather than just stating that it helps them learn.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'On the other hand', 'Let's begin with'). There are also instances where the logical flow between sentences is slightly disjointed, such as in the second paragraph where the transition between the idea of selfishness and learning life aspects is abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence flows naturally from the previous one would enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'good or bad way' and 'things in routine life'. There are also some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'confront' instead of 'contend' or 'argue'. To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to child development and psychology, and focus on using collocations more accurately to express your ideas with greater nuance.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally hinder clarity. For instance, 'While other believe' should be 'While others believe', and 'making mind set of individuals' is awkward phrasing. There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and article usage throughout the text. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and pluralization would be a significant step forward.

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