Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The growing influence of high-speed railway lines in modern society has sparked various debates. This issue is particularly significant because its impact affects both individuals and communities in multiple ways. In this essay, I will discuss both views and give my opinion.
One of the key aspects of high-speed railway lines is that it promotes innovation, creativity, and access to a wide range of opportunities. This is also evident from the fact that high-speed railway lines help in improving understanding, tolerance, and problem-solving methods in society. As shown in various studies, high-speed railway lines have had a profound effect on strengthening social harmony and economic growth in many regions. Another important aspect of high-speed railway lines is that they are vital for both individual development and collective progress.
However, despite these benefits, high-speed railway lines can also lead to significant challenges. For example, differences in values and beliefs related to high-speed railway lines may sometimes lead to misunderstandings and conflicts. Various studies have shown that high-speed railway lines may create communication barriers and integration issues among different groups. Additionally, they can lead to social tensions, which may negatively affect relationships and unity within communities.
In conclusion, both views have their own merits. However, I believe that the overall impact of high-speed railway lines depends on how effectively they are managed in society.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 2.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 2.0
The response is completely off-topic. The prompt asks for a discussion on whether children should be allowed to make their own choices regarding everyday matters like food and clothing. However, your essay discusses the influence of 'high-speed railway lines' throughout. Because you have failed to address the prompt entirely, the task achievement is severely compromised. Additionally, the response is under the 250-word minimum requirement, which further impacts the score. To improve, you must carefully read the prompt and ensure your arguments directly relate to the specific topic provided in the task instructions.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
While the essay is structured into paragraphs and uses some basic cohesive devices like 'However' and 'In conclusion', the content within these paragraphs is irrelevant to the prompt. The logical flow is present in terms of sentence structure, but because the subject matter is entirely disconnected from the task, the coherence is undermined. The paragraphing is sufficient, but the lack of relevant ideas makes the overall progression meaningless in the context of the exam question.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
You demonstrate a reasonable range of vocabulary, such as 'innovation', 'profound effect', and 'social harmony'. However, these words are used in the context of high-speed railways rather than the topic of child development and decision-making. The vocabulary is adequate for expressing general ideas, but it fails to address the specific requirements of the task. You need to focus on using topic-specific vocabulary related to the actual prompt provided in the exam.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The grammatical range is acceptable, with a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are few grammatical errors, and the sentences are generally clear and readable. You use complex structures like 'This is also evident from the fact that...' and 'Despite these benefits, high-speed railway lines can also lead to...'. While the grammar is relatively strong, the complete lack of relevance to the topic means the language is not being used to fulfill the communicative purpose of the task.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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