Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-08
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The growing influence of food, clothes and entertainment has sparked various debates. This issue is particularly significant because its impact affects both individuals and communities in multiple ways. In this essay, I will discuss the positive and negative aspects and give my opinion.
On the one hand, supporters believe that children should be allowed to make their own choices about everyday matters, such as food and clothes. These choices can have a significant impact on children's personalities. Food is also very important for children's health. Moreover, making their own choices can promote independence, creativity and access to a wide range of opportunities. This can also contribute to their personal development and improve their understanding, tolerance and problem-solving skills.
On the other hand, some people believe that parents should make decisions for their children. Children may choose fast food, expensive clothes or video games instead of healthy food and useful activities. Therefore, parents should guide their children and limit unhealthy food at home. For example, children may choose branded clothes and other expensive items because they are influenced by famous people or trends.
In conclusion, both views have their own merits. However, I believe that children should have limited freedom to make their own choices while parents should provide proper guidance. This is a better approach because it gives children some independence while also protecting their health and development.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the response is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which limits the depth of the discussion. While the ideas are relevant, they are somewhat underdeveloped; for instance, the points regarding 'creativity' and 'problem-solving' are mentioned but not supported with specific examples or logical expansion. The introduction is also slightly vague, as it refers to the 'influence of food, clothes and entertainment' rather than the act of allowing children to make choices about these matters. To improve, you must expand your arguments with more detailed explanations and ensure you meet the minimum word count to allow for full development of your ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear structure consisting of an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the two opposing views. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'Moreover', and 'Therefore' are used to link ideas effectively. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes a bit mechanical, and the overall progression could be smoother if the ideas within the paragraphs were more thoroughly linked to the main topic. The use of referencing is generally clear, though the essay would benefit from a wider variety of cohesive markers to improve the sophistication of the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band score. You rely on fairly common terms like 'important', 'choices', and 'good'. While you attempt some topic-specific vocabulary such as 'personal development' and 'proper guidance', there is little evidence of less common lexical items or idiomatic expressions. Some phrasing is slightly repetitive, particularly the repeated use of 'choices' and 'children'. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms and collocations related to child development and parental authority.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. Most sentences are grammatically accurate, and errors are rare and do not impede communication. For example, you correctly use modal verbs like 'should' and 'may'. However, the range of structures is somewhat limited; there is a reliance on straightforward subject-verb-object patterns. To improve, you should aim to incorporate a wider variety of complex structures, such as conditional sentences or passive voice, to demonstrate greater grammatical flexibility. Punctuation is generally correct, and the overall control of grammar is solid for this level.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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