Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Many parents and people can be asked the children to make their own choices on the everyday matters such as clothes and entertainment. And other people believe it is important for children to make decision about matters in our daily life

first I like to talk about the those people who think that children take own decision . This is a good thought for many people that they children can take own decision . This thing can make the children brave. In his daily life they can not share his ideas and personal maters to the other people .

second the other people believe that children are the small and they can not give the important decision in her daily life. Because they can make the some decision they are harmful in her life. The thought of the people is good for their children .

In my opinion they people are true who thought the children do not give any important decision in her life . Because in the life there are many decision that children could not be make .Many people can asked your children to take your decision .In this situation children can take wrong way .In this situation they can destroy our life .And many parents can felt badly in the soca

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you attempt to address both sides of the argument and provide a personal opinion, the ideas are underdeveloped and lack sufficient explanation or relevant examples. The arguments remain superficial, and the conclusion is abrupt and unclear. To improve, you must expand on your points with specific examples and ensure your position is clearly articulated and supported throughout the essay. The current length prevents a full exploration of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often unclear. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and sometimes mechanical (e.g., 'first', 'second'). There are issues with referencing, such as the inconsistent use of pronouns like 'his', 'her', and 'their' when referring to children, which makes the text difficult to follow. The logical flow between sentences is frequently interrupted by grammatical errors, making the overall structure feel disjointed. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring consistent pronoun usage would greatly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, which limits your ability to express complex ideas. You rely on simple words like 'good', 'important', and 'people' throughout the text. There are also instances of incorrect word choice, such as 'the children are the small' and 'destroy our life', which hinder clarity. To achieve a higher band score, you need to expand your range of vocabulary to include more precise, topic-specific terms and collocations. Focus on using synonyms to avoid repetition and ensure that your word choices are appropriate for an academic context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Many people can asked'), article usage, and sentence structure. Many sentences are fragmented or lack the necessary complexity expected at higher levels. The misuse of pronouns and incorrect verb tenses further complicates the meaning. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring subject-verb agreement, and practicing the correct use of articles and pronouns. Developing a wider range of complex sentence structures will also be essential for a higher score.

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