Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Taking correct decision of life is very crucial, every single decision can change life whether in positive way or in negative. Young people play important role in today's society as they are future, so making correct choice is crucial for them so some people believe that children should have full rights to make their decisions of their everyday life on there own wishes which will help them where as some believe that they should make decisions about matters that affect them.
On one hand, If parents give liability to children to take every crucial decision of their life by themselves only it will impact child life in various ways. If they have full independence to make any decision then they start taking every thing very lightly and they only think about themselves. Moreover, they do not think about society and start doing those things which benefit them. For example, if child is making decision then he will only think about food or buying clothes or any other thing which give entertainment to them they will stop studying and it will impact their future.
On other hand, some people think that children should make decisions about matters that affect them. Children should have maturity level of taking correct decisions which are good for there upcoming life. For instance, if children is taking decision of becoming doctor then it will affect his life in good way and it also good for country.
In conclusion, parents should supervise children when they are making important decision of their life because some children are not good at decision making so they choose wrong things which further impact there lives.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both views and provides a clear personal opinion in the conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding children becoming self-centered is mentioned but not fully explored with depth. The example provided about a child choosing to become a doctor is relevant but lacks sufficient detail to fully support the argument. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your points with more specific reasoning or illustrative examples. The introduction is a bit repetitive and could be more concise to allow for more space to develop the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'On one hand', 'On other hand', and 'In conclusion' to signal shifts in the argument. However, the flow between sentences is sometimes mechanical, and the use of cohesive devices could be more varied and sophisticated. Additionally, there are some issues with referencing; for example, the phrase 'it will impact child life' is slightly awkward. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring smoother transitions between sentences would enhance the overall coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'correct decision', 'good', and 'bad', which are repeated throughout the text. There are also some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'taking correct decision of life' instead of 'making the right life decisions' and 'liability' instead of 'responsibility'. To improve, try to incorporate more topic-specific vocabulary related to child development and autonomy, and focus on using more precise collocations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Common issues include missing articles (e.g., 'if child is making decision'), incorrect preposition usage, and subject-verb agreement errors (e.g., 'it also good for country'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma splices in the introduction. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for articles and pluralization would be highly beneficial.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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