Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-15
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Some people believe that children should not be allowed to make too many choices because they may become selfish. Others think that children should be able to make decisions about things that affect them. In my opinion, children should have some freedom to choose, but parents should guide them. In this essay will will discuss both the views and opinion.
Firstly, giving children too many choices may make them think only about their own wishes. If children, always choose their entertainment, they may spend too much time playing games or watching television. As, it results they may become less caring and will not considering people. If children are always allowed to choose whatever they want, they may start thinking only about their own happiness and ignore the needs of other people. For Example, if parents allows their children to choose any type of food they like to have, they may often choose burgers, pizza, chocolates and other unhealthy foods instead of having healthy meals.
Secondly, allowing children to make their own decisions can help them to become independent and responsible. When children choose their clothes, hobbies or food, they learn to know the results of their decisions. It also encourage the confidence and self expressions, it allows them to express these preferences can help them understand better way. For Example,
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The essay addresses both views and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the response is significantly under the 250-word minimum, which limits the depth of the arguments. The second body paragraph is incomplete, ending abruptly after 'For Example,', which prevents the full development of the point. While the ideas presented are relevant, the lack of a conclusion and the incomplete nature of the final paragraph mean that the task is only partially addressed. To improve, you must ensure you complete all parts of the prompt and meet the minimum word count to allow for full development of your ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay uses basic cohesive devices such as 'Firstly' and 'Secondly' to organize the paragraphs. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete ending. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the phrase 'As, it results they may become less caring', where the connection between the clauses is awkward. Paragraphing is present, but the abrupt termination of the second paragraph disrupts the logical flow of the essay. To improve, focus on using a wider range of linking words and ensure that every paragraph has a clear, complete structure including a concluding sentence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but remains quite repetitive and simple. Phrases like 'choose whatever they want' and 'think only about their own happiness' are functional but lack the precision expected at higher bands. There are some minor errors in word choice, such as 'will not considering people' instead of 'will not consider other people'. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more academic collocations and less common vocabulary related to child development and decision-making, while ensuring accurate usage.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow, such as 'In this essay will will discuss' (repetition and missing subject) and 'parents allows their children' (subject-verb agreement error). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the misuse of commas in 'As, it results' and 'For Example,'. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors suggests a need for more careful proofreading and a better grasp of basic sentence construction.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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