Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

some in individuals think that letting children make decisions on daily life aspects will lead to community where people become selfish, but other argue that it is necessary for children to learn to make their choices at young age. This essay will discuss both views and explain why i believe children should be allowed to take their own decisions.

people who think allowing children to make their choices think they end up contributing to society with people who cares only about their thoughts. And the reasons for this are they think children are too young to make decisions for themselves, as they can end up messing with their lives. And parents assume that they know their kids well, so they end up controlling their lives by making choices for them. Kids whose parents let them make choices in terms of food, cloths, entertainment ended up being selfish, making unhealthy food choices, spending money on shopping regardless of their parent's financial struggle.

While others argue that it is very important to allow children to decide for themselves, in order to convert them into independent individuals. Letting kids make their choices, allowing them to make mistakes and learn their impact at young age rather than to deal big ones as grownups. As a result, they will grow up to a wiser and smarter individuals, especially when they always have their parents alongside to support them.

My stand is with the ones who believe that kids should be allowed to make choices as they tend to learn life lessons at young age, which results in a greater confidence as they grow up. Experience is something that can teach well.

To conclude, although kids might end up in society with selfish people, i believe it is necessary to let children take decisions so that they become responsible for their lives and learn valuable lessons at their younger versions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both views and providing a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, though the development is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding children becoming selfish is mentioned but lacks specific examples or deeper analysis. The position is consistent throughout the essay. To improve, you should aim to expand on your points with more detailed explanations or concrete examples to reach a higher band. The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, though it is quite brief. Overall, the task is fulfilled, but the depth of argumentation needs to be increased to move beyond a basic level of development.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is a basic progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. For example, the transition 'While others argue' is used effectively, but other links between sentences are occasionally weak or missing, making the flow feel slightly disjointed. Referencing is generally clear, but the essay would benefit from a wider variety of linking words and phrases to improve the overall flow and connectivity between ideas. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different viewpoints.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'independent individuals' and 'financial struggle'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and minor errors, such as 'messing with their lives' (too informal) and 'younger versions' (awkward phrasing). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, and there is little evidence of less common or more sophisticated lexical items. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoiding informal or conversational language to enhance the professional tone of your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('other argue', 'people who cares') and awkward phrasing ('grow up to a wiser and smarter individuals'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some errors in sentence construction. The range of structures is sufficient to communicate your points, but the frequency of errors prevents a higher score. Focusing on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly with articles and pluralization, will help improve your score significantly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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