Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
People believe that children should allow to make their own decisions on everyday matters like eating food, clothes and entertainment activities. This practice is likely to result that they only think about their own choices and wishes which makes the society of individuals. On the other hand some people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that can affect them. In my opinion children should not be allowed to make their own decisions because they always prefer their own wishes which sometimes are not acceptable.
Firstly, children are not very much intelligent to make their own choices. They always prefer their wishes and do not care about money and their health. For example nowadays children likes to eat fast food very much because it is very tasty but eating regularly causes many health issues that is dangerous for children. If we can discuss about entertainment they are always ready for it. Children are watching so many cartoon shows and wants to wear their costume and their products. In this age they are not mature enough to decide what they wear and what they want.
Furthermore, some people believe that it is necessary for children to make decisions about their own matters like which subject they want to study ans persue their career. These decisions can affect them and give the capability for children to think about their goals.
In conclusion children
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of the argument. While you address both sides of the prompt and state a clear opinion, the essay is incomplete, ending abruptly in the conclusion. The ideas presented, such as the impact of fast food on health, are relevant but remain underdeveloped due to the lack of a full conclusion and limited supporting evidence. To improve, ensure you fully explore each viewpoint with balanced arguments and provide a complete, well-structured conclusion that synthesizes your position.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay shows some logical organization, with clear paragraph breaks for the introduction and body paragraphs. However, the progression of ideas is interrupted by the incomplete nature of the text. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly' and 'Furthermore', but the overall flow is hindered by the abrupt ending. To reach a higher band, you should ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that ideas are linked more fluidly throughout the entire response, including a fully realized concluding paragraph.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing, such as 'not very much intelligent' and 'always prefer their wishes'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'persue their career' (spelling error) and 'makes the society of individuals'. To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary and collocations, and ensure you check your spelling of common words.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'children should allow to make' (passive voice error), 'result that they' (missing preposition), and 'children likes to eat' (subject-verb agreement). Punctuation is also inconsistent. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of passive voice, before attempting more complex structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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