Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is believed by some people that children should be provided proper independency to take their decisions whereas others argue that if children get any opportunity to make their desirable choices, it may give a negative outcome for the society. In my opinion, I partially agree that children need to express their own choices when they select any kinds of components. This essay intends to discuss both perspectives.

On the one hand, in this contemporary society people from diverse backgrounds want to be an independent citizen and they are not willing to rely on others decision. It is a intrapersonal ability of people which creates in their mind from their childhood. For example, children can choice what color of dresses they wear in any kinds of events or which types of cuisine they prefer to have. These skills facilitate a great scope to enhance not only their creative knowledge but also improve their decision power. As people able to take appropriate decision from their childhood , they can easily identify their strength and weakness. On the basis of this analysis , they may able to choose their desirable professional life.

On the other hand, it has also some drawbacks in the society. Some people believe that if children focus on their own choices, they may not make a good relationship with other neighbors. For instance, people from diverse backgrounds stay in a society. In this term, if society people want to organize any kind of event, they need to take various suggestions. Though young generation follow their own strategy, they may not agree with others' opinion. As a result, a society may unable to arrange any kinds of festivals together. It creates a hazardous situation not only for the events but also the relationship between younger and older. Older generation may not get enough respect from young people.

In conclusion, I reiterate my opinion that although children have right to take their own decision it also creates some adverse impacts on the society. Children get freedom which is a beneficial part for children future but the elder generation of society may not get proper respect and dignity from these kinds of generation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat inconsistent. While the benefits of independence are explained reasonably well, the argument regarding the 'drawbacks'—specifically the claim that children making choices leads to a lack of respect for elders—is somewhat tenuous and lacks logical depth. To improve, ensure that your supporting points are more universally applicable and clearly linked to the prompt's core concern about self-centeredness versus autonomy.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, and the progression of ideas is generally clear. You use cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion' to signal shifts in the argument. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as in the phrase 'In this term' or 'these kinds of generation.' Improving the variety of cohesive links and ensuring that pronouns clearly refer back to their antecedents would help the flow of the essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, but there are several instances of awkward word choice and non-standard collocations. For example, 'proper independency' should be 'proper independence,' and 'select any kinds of components' is unnatural in this context. Additionally, 'intrapersonal ability' is used incorrectly here. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise academic collocations and avoid translating directly from your first language, which occasionally leads to phrasing that sounds slightly unnatural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'As people able to take' (missing verb 'are'), 'it has also some drawbacks' (should be 'there are'), and 'a society may unable to' (missing 'be'). These errors are noticeable but do not generally impede communication. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of modal verbs and auxiliary verbs in complex constructions.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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