Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-20
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In the present, It is important that the children should be mature annd responsible in the future. Many individuals thinks that own choices of children will affect the society while some people thinks their own decision are more important which affect their matters. I will look at both side of the arguments and give my opinion.
Firstly, own decisions have more benefits because, it makes the children decision maker and meantally mature. To illustrates this point, if you are away from your family or in foreign country and suddenly an incident arrives, so you are able to take decions what should you do at this time. Obviously, making own decision gives you chances to live better in any any condition.
On the other hand, many individuals thinks that own choices make the children selfish. For example, they loses the ability of right and wrong way such as eating junk food on regular bases, over dressing and so on. These all things beacuse they will not care about their family or sorroundings. In other words these things will affect on the future life and will make the student immature mentally and irresposible.
In my opinion, own decisoin will gives the more confidential life to take any decision in any situation. Students will not depend on other person to take decision and can live their life with freedom.
To conclude, giving too much freedom will make the students selfish while it is essential for children to make some decision that affect them with proper parental guidance, this can help children become responsible and independent in the future
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding children becoming 'selfish' is supported by examples like 'eating junk food', but the explanation remains superficial. The essay covers all parts of the prompt, but the reasoning lacks depth and sophistication. The conclusion provides a balanced summary, but the overall development of the arguments is basic, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. To improve, you should expand on your points with more detailed explanations and more specific, relevant examples.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. There is a logical progression from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or repetitive (e.g., 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', 'In other words'). Additionally, some transitions are awkward, such as 'These all things beacuse they will not care about their family'. While the paragraphing is appropriate, the internal cohesion within paragraphs is sometimes weak, making the flow feel slightly disjointed at times.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for a higher band. There are several instances of awkward word choices and collocations, such as 'confidential life' (likely meaning 'confident') and 'over dressing'. Spelling errors are also present, such as 'annd', 'meantally', 'decions', and 'sorroundings'. While the meaning is generally clear, the limited range of vocabulary and the frequency of errors in word choice and spelling indicate a band 5.5 level. You should focus on learning more precise collocations and proofreading your work for common spelling mistakes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('Many individuals thinks'), incorrect article usage, and awkward phrasing ('In the present, It is important that the children should be mature annd responsible'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to distract the reader and indicate a lack of control over complex structures. Focusing on basic sentence construction and subject-verb agreement would significantly improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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