Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This statement shows some mankinds believe that allowing childern to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food, clothes and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other human beings believe that it is crucial for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. In my view it is not good to allowing children to do what they want to. Moreover it would be effect their habbits as well as their society.The main reason is that ,No matter what kind of effect the society have. Additionally it would be humiliate the poor or the needy who lives in society. For example the younger who have their own choices they would not be known the effect of the culture or the surrounding that how would be they live there. On the other the folks who trust that that it is important for the childern to make decisions about matters that affect them Meanwhile make them independent. They would live what kind of life they want. Not from the pressure of the society. Furthermore for intence a child is thinking about his likes or his dislikes. He would do or take step to achive them, He would never think what the society would be think. In nut shell it is dobut full that childern learn so many things or hoe to handle the matters from the society. Its mean they have not spoiled its means they are learning from the different ways

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both sides of the argument, but the development of ideas is significantly hindered by unclear expression and a lack of logical progression. While you state your opinion, the supporting arguments—such as the claim that allowing choices would 'humiliate the poor'—are not clearly explained or relevant to the prompt. The ideas remain superficial and often confusing, making it difficult for the reader to follow your reasoning. To improve, focus on providing clear, logical examples that directly support your main points rather than abstract or disconnected statements.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear structure. Paragraphing is absent, and the flow of ideas is disjointed. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Moreover', 'Additionally', and 'Furthermore', they are often used incorrectly or do not logically connect the preceding and following sentences. The lack of clear topic sentences makes it difficult to identify the main point of each section. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on one main idea and use linking words to show the relationship between your arguments rather than just starting new sentences with them.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite limited and often repetitive. There are several instances of word-choice errors, such as 'mankinds' instead of 'people', 'habbits' (spelling error), and 'humiliate' used in an inappropriate context. Phrases like 'in nut shell' (in a nutshell) and 'intence' (instance) show a lack of control over common collocations and idiomatic language. To improve, focus on learning the correct spelling of basic words and expanding your vocabulary to include more precise terms related to child development and societal influence.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement ('the needy who lives'), sentence fragments, and incorrect verb forms ('it is not good to allowing'). The sentence structures are mostly simple and often contain errors in word order, which makes the text difficult to read. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of infinitives and gerunds. Proofreading for basic punctuation and spelling errors would also significantly improve the clarity of your writing.

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