Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Few people belief that allowing kids make their own decision on daily matters ( such as food, clothes, and entertainment ) is likely to result in a society of people who only think about their own wishes. Meanwhile, others think it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

From my point of view, I do not think it is necessary to allow children make their own choice on daily basis. Allowing minors decide on what to do everyday leads to disasters. Most children don not thing before action, allow them to make choices may likely affect them and others kids around them. Example, allowing them to make choice on what to eat and what not to eat may cause them problem, a child might decide to eat sugary things all everyday and it will definitely affect their health. Their diets and nutrition are supposed to be monitored by their carer.

However, giving young individuals opportunity to decide on the type pf clothes they want to wear gives them the chance to choose who they are or what they want to be in the future. Most children who dresses like superstars, superheros and other cartoon characters, defines who they are or what they will like to be in the years coming. They should be given the chance to do choose themselves.

On the other hand, kids makes choices on what entertainment they need. I do not think parents or guidance can decide on the type of play they want or the kind of movie and cartoon they would love to watch. Children always make their own decision in regarding to any entertainment of their choice.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the argument regarding entertainment is underdeveloped and lacks specific reasoning or examples to support the claim that children should always make their own choices in this area. The essay tends to over-generalize, particularly in the claim that allowing children to make choices 'leads to disasters.' While the task is addressed, the supporting arguments lack the depth and nuance required for a higher band score. The position is clear, but the supporting points could be more effectively extended.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or repetitive. For example, the transition 'On the other hand' is used, but the logical flow between sentences within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the link between 'superstars' and 'who they are' is not fully articulated. The progression of ideas is present but lacks the sophisticated linking required for higher bands. Paragraphing is used, but the internal structure of the paragraphs could be improved for better flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision expected at higher levels. There are several instances of word-choice errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'do not thing before action' (should be 'think') and 'in regarding to' (should be 'regarding'). The range is somewhat limited, relying on basic vocabulary to express ideas. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of flexibility and the presence of errors in collocation and word formation prevent a higher score. More precise academic vocabulary would enhance the quality of the argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Examples include 'Few people belief' (should be 'believe'), 'allowing kids make' (should be 'allowing kids to make'), and 'Most children who dresses' (should be 'dress'). Punctuation errors, such as unnecessary spaces inside parentheses, are also present. While the meaning is usually conveyed, the high frequency of errors in basic subject-verb agreement and verb forms indicates a lack of control over complex structures. More attention to proofreading and grammatical accuracy is necessary.

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