Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-08-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many individuals thinks that giving permission to children to make their decisions on daily matters like food, clothes and entertainment will ends in a gathering of individuals who only think about their own wants whereas some people believe that it is necessary for their broods to make their own choice for anything they want.

The reason why parents believe that if they allow their children to make decisions will result in opposite way like the children will only think about themselves and there will be no need to care about others which is wrong because allowing your children to make own choices does not mean they will stop having feelings

In my believe, children should have the right to choose their own decision for what they want or not nevertheless the parents should be guiding them like is their decision correct or not. Are they doing anything wrong or not. For instance, if a child decided to watch an adult movie then he should tell this decision to his parents and its the work of his elders to tell him that his choice is wrong instead of scolding him or telling him that you are grounded and cannot make your own choices. it is very important to allow your children to make their decisions in everyday matters for their better future as it is better to some extent and it will does not result in a society of selfishness because they will feel how the other person thinks.

To the sum this up parents should allow their children to have their own choices.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the task. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments are somewhat repetitive and lack depth, particularly in explaining why the opposing view might be valid or how the proposed solution works in practice. The essay relies on simple assertions rather than well-supported reasoning. To improve, you should expand on your points with more detailed explanations and specific, well-integrated examples. The conclusion is also very brief and does not effectively summarize the main points discussed in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the structure is weak. There is a lack of clear logical progression between sentences, and the use of cohesive devices is minimal and sometimes awkward, such as 'To the sum this up'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow of ideas feels disjointed. The transition between the two viewpoints and your own opinion is abrupt. To reach a higher band, you should use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more fluidly and ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic sentence that guides the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. You use basic terms like 'broods' (which is inappropriate in this context) and 'work of his elders'. There are also some word-choice errors, such as 'ends in a gathering' instead of 'results in a society'. The range of vocabulary is limited, and you rely on simple, repetitive phrasing. To improve, focus on using more academic collocations and precise terminology related to child development and parenting. Avoid informal or archaic language to ensure your tone remains appropriate for an academic essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('Many individuals thinks', 'it will does not result') and awkward sentence structures. While you attempt some complex sentences, they are often marred by errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several sentence fragments and run-on sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and sentence construction. Practice proofreading your work to identify and correct these recurring errors, and try to incorporate a wider variety of complex structures with greater accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.