Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people believe giving children a free hand in their daily matters can cause adverse effects nevertheless others contend that it is pivotal to boost their confidence. I strongly believe that youngsters must take their basic decision by themselves without any involvement of their guardians because this is vital to build their strong decision making personalities. This essay will further explain both sides.

In this contemporary era, where everyone wants to dominate their competitors, it is essential to have self-esteem and sharp mental capabilities. In order to make this possible, parents should train their off-springs from young age to take their own decisions rather than under their scrutiny. Additionally, this will enhance their self-confidence and they will able to think critically. For instance, higher proportion of billionaires are self-made who grows their empires by their own efforts rather than depending on their family.

In contrast, some citizens argue that their children should be under their supervision, so they can protect their adolescents from detrimental effects. They have tentative feelings about their decisions consequently they do not give them this responsibility. From my perspective, this leads to destruction of their motivation and self-confidence and they always feel uncertain about their goals. Because they do not have any skill to do brainstorming and this will takes towards harmful factors, effecting their future. Another significant factor is lack of their personality growth over the time in comparison to other people of same age.

Overall, in my view it is indispensable to train the off-springs from a young age to enhance their capabilities, by promoting technical games.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal position. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the example regarding 'billionaires' is not directly relevant to the prompt's focus on 'everyday matters' like food or clothes. The argument in the third paragraph is also slightly repetitive and lacks specific, concrete examples to support the claim that parental supervision leads to a lack of personality growth. To improve, ensure that your supporting points are directly linked to the specific examples mentioned in the prompt and provide more depth to your reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, and there is a clear progression of ideas. Cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'Additionally', and 'Overall' are used to link sentences and paragraphs. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'They have tentative feelings about their decisions' where the antecedent for 'They' is slightly ambiguous. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different viewpoints, which helps the reader follow the argument.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with some attempts at less common items like 'contemporary era', 'scrutiny', and 'indispensable'. However, there are noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'take their basic decision' (should be 'make'), 'off-springs' (the plural is 'offspring'), and 'do brainstorming' (should be 'brainstorm'). These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of the argument. Expanding your range of collocations and ensuring correct word forms will help improve this score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as 'who grows their empires' (subject-verb agreement), 'they will able to' (missing verb), and 'this will takes towards' (incorrect verb form). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage around introductory phrases and conjunctions. To reach a higher band, focus on ensuring subject-verb agreement and correct verb tense usage, and aim for more error-free complex sentences.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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