Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-09
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Some of the peoples, who believe that allowing children to make their own choices for their lifestyle is good because the children have their rights and the environment of the society is changed and the children also have to known which thing is good for him or her. I think so, if the children's are allowed to make their own choices in the factors such as food, clothes and entertainment etc. Then they are able to make decision easier in their life and it is very helpful of them and they also get confident by deciding their lifestyle and their environment.
On the other hand, some people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them because some of the matters are serious and they are out of range of children and this is not easier to make decision and sometimes the decision is not in the favor of the children or the society.
After all, my personal opinion is that if the children is adult and he/she known they are benefited by making decision by itself then they are allowed to make decision about their lifestyle according to the environment of the society and also children have to check which thing is good for him or which is not.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the prompt. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments are repetitive and lack specific examples or depth. For instance, the discussion on why children should make decisions is vague, relying on general statements like 'they have their rights' rather than exploring the psychological or social implications. The conclusion is also slightly confusing, as it introduces the concept of 'adult' children, which deviates from the focus on childhood development. To improve, you should provide concrete examples and more nuanced reasoning for each perspective.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression within them is weak. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the other hand' and 'After all', but they are sometimes used incorrectly or mechanically. The connection between sentences is often disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of the argument. For example, the transition from the first paragraph to the second is abrupt. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the final paragraph where the subject shifts from 'children' to 'adult' without a clear logical link. More varied and precise linking words are needed to improve the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'things', 'good', and 'make decision' throughout the text. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'some of the peoples' (incorrect pluralization) and 'out of range of children' (which is not a standard idiomatic expression for this context). While the meaning is generally understandable, the lack of precision and the reliance on simple language prevent the essay from achieving a higher score. To improve, focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary related to child development and autonomy, and practice using synonyms to avoid repetition.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'the children's are allowed' and 'if the children is adult'. Articles are also frequently misused or omitted, as seen in 'the environment of the society'. Sentence structures are largely simple or contain errors when attempting complexity. For example, the sentence 'I think so, if the children's are allowed...' is poorly constructed. To reach a higher band, you need to focus on basic grammatical accuracy, particularly pluralization, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles, before attempting more complex sentence structures.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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