Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-13
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
nowadays , some people beleive that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matter and some people are ask that it is the important for children to make decision about matters that effect them but in my opinion childrens to make their own choices on everday matter is a best . because people have own choices are good work provided .
first of all , some people are believe that allow children to make their own choices on every day matter like food , clothes and entertainment because when childrens our decision do very well and childrens clothes are today trends but parends choices is old fasion and childrens do not like old fasion . i think childrends decision is a very important in todays life because every persons are very cleaver .
on my second hand , other people believe that it is important for children to make decision about matter that affect them because some time parents have not a money and they not provided new clothes and some people do not listen to parents and they do entertainment and some people want go to the restaurant and eat food . but they are a very bad because some time people have not a money so , they do not provide a money and not parchage clothes and food .
in conclusion , some people believe thet allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matter but some people believe childrens to make decision about matter that affect them but i think every childrens have a own choices in our life .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response attempts to address both views and provide an opinion, which satisfies the basic prompt requirements. However, the ideas are severely under-developed, repetitious, and difficult to follow due to poor articulation. For instance, the writer states that 'childrens clothes are today trends but parends choices is old fasion' as a supporting point, but this argument is not extended or explained in a logical manner. The writer's position is stated, but the reasoning remains superficial throughout the essay, lacking relevant and well-supported examples. Consequently, this performance aligns closely with the Band 4 descriptor, where the task is addressed only minimally and ideas are insufficiently developed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the overall organisation lacks a clear logical progression. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or incorrectly, such as 'on my second hand' instead of 'on the other hand'. Furthermore, referencing and substitution are frequently faulty, making it very hard to determine what pronouns and phrases refer to. For example, sentences like 'but they are a very bad because some time people have not a money' lack clear antecedents and disrupt the flow of information. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs fails to guide the reader smoothly, placing the response firmly at Band 4.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with frequent errors in word choice, form, and spelling (e.g., 'beleive', 'matter' instead of 'matters', 'parends', 'fasion', 'cleaver', 'parchage'). The writer relies heavily on simple, high-frequency words and struggles to use less common lexical items accurately. Phrases like 'everday matter is a best' and 'good work provided' demonstrate a very limited grasp of appropriate collocations and phrasing. These numerous lexical inadequacies strain the reader's understanding and match the characteristics of Band 4, where vocabulary is basic and errors frequently cause strain.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The grammatical range is extremely limited, consisting mostly of poorly constructed simple and attempted complex sentences that are fraught with errors. There is a persistent lack of control over basic grammatical structures, including subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, and article usage (e.g., 'childrens to make their own choices', 'parents have not a money', 'every childrens have a own choices'). Punctuation is also problematic, with spaces incorrectly placed before commas and periods throughout the text. Because errors are frequent and often distort the intended meaning, the grammar warrants a Band 4 rating.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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