Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the current society, the community is polarised in two groups almost equally regarding the issue that granting children to move with their own choices in daily life, like food, clothes and entertainment which as a consequence, become a society of people who are only think about their own ambitions. However, other thinks that it is crucial for children to make only those decisions which can affect their life, which is completely against the first stated idea. This essay would shed light on both aspects. As far as I am concerned, I believe that children should have liberty to make their own decisions which enable them to spend life with autonomy.

Elaborating on the mindset of those individuals who are in the favour of the first stated idea. First and foremost, the most signilficant contribution of life autonomy is to become rapid and astute decision maker. This has led to the developments of cognitive abilities, taking swift actions and better implementation with less detrimental consequences. A survey conducted in the United States had its findings published in a renowned journal that 70% of children who spent their life with freedom to take the things of their own choice are the best decision makers regarding their life. Therefore, giving freedom to children in their childhood could become advantageous to them when they grow up in their life.

Shifting forward to the latter school of thought that a small wrong decision could have huge adverse effect. It is best for children to take decisions about matters which can facilitate them to push upwards in their life and parents should play a role in rest of their decisions. Paying focus towards particular things can play a vital role to expand the understanding which can lead to unexpected breakthroughs in the future. For instance, Mahendra Singh Dhoni was one of them who ignored the small decision in his life, however, he took the decision to work on specific things that can made him experts in his career.

To conclude it all, although both views have their own valid points, i believe that taking quick decisions by any means can make people's lives a bed of roses which can further contribute to the welfare and society. Rapid decisions can reap a benefit for the society through which our society can become a better place to live in.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views on children making decisions and providing a clear personal opinion. The writer's position is stated in the introduction and maintained throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and occasionally wanders. For example, the body paragraph attempting to discuss the opposing view about adverse effects transitions abruptly into an underdeveloped example regarding Mahendra Singh Dhoni, which lacks clear explanation of how it connects to the prompt. While the arguments are generally relevant, they tend to generalise and lack deep elaboration. Therefore, the response aligns best with Band 6.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into paragraphs representing an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. Expressions such as "Shifting forward to the latter school of thought" and fragmented sentence openings like "Elaborating on the mindset of those individuals who are in the favour of the first stated idea" create disjointed reading. Paragraphing is used, but internal paragraph cohesion suffers from abrupt transitions and referencing issues, such as pronoun ambiguity. Thus, the organizational framework meets the requirements for a Band 6.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as "polarised", "detrimental consequences", and "autonomy". However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors that detract from precision, such as "granting children to move with their own choices" instead of "making their own choices", and "signilficant" (a spelling error). Phrases like "push upwards in their life" and "make people's lives a bed of roses" are somewhat awkward or misused in context. Because the vocabulary is sufficient to convey meaning despite these errors, a Band 6 is appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent structural errors and fragments, such as starting a sentence with a participle phrase without a main clause ("Elaborating on the mindset...") and sentence boundary issues in the conclusion ("...i believe that taking quick decisions by any means can make people's lives a bed of roses which can further contribute..."). Other errors include subject-verb agreement issues like "Other thinks that..." and "people who are only think about...". These errors occasionally impede communication, placing the grammar firmly in the Band 5 category.

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