Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Nowadays, people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food, clothes and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
On the one hand, allowing children to make all their own choices can lead to a selfish society. If children allow to eat that what they like or wear expensive clothes. They may not learn how to compromise or consider other. For example: If parents allow to eat junk food daily over the home prepare food may be developed bad habit. They ignore their parents advice. Nowadays some children waste their parents money buying branded clothes and enjoying in the bar.Such as, now if we see children need expensive mobile phone like Iphone. By this type of behavior they will be irresponsible in their life.
On the other hand, it is crucial for children to learn desicion making from a young age. When children are involved in dmall choices ,they developed their confident and a sense of responsibility. They will be mature and depent on their choices.
In my opinion, a balanced approach is best. To give freedom choices in their life they can desicion their future what they want but parents should give freedom in limit
In conclusion, although giving total freedom might create selfish children. I believe that teaching children to make own decisions in a controlled way is necessary for their personal growth.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views—that autonomy leads to selfishness and that decision-making is crucial for children—and provides a clear personal opinion in the conclusion and body. Ideas are relevant, such as discussing dietary choices and financial habits, but they tend to be somewhat under-developed and limited in extension. For example, the argument regarding children wasting money on branded clothes and bars is raised but not fully elaborated to show the broader societal impact. However, a clear position is maintained throughout, satisfying the requirements for a Band 6.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with clear paragraphing, separating the introduction, two body paragraphs representing different views, the writer's opinion, and the conclusion. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical. Transition phrases like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are used, but referencing and linking within sentences are occasionally awkward, such as 'Such as, now if we see children need...' Furthermore, paragraphing for the writer's opinion is slightly fragmented, appearing as a very short standalone section before the conclusion, which impacts logical progression.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common words and phrases such as 'compromise', 'personal growth', and 'balanced approach'. However, there are noticeable word-choice errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, such as 'home prepare food', 'enjoying in the bar', and 'freedom choices'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but lexical inaccuracies sometimes cause the reader to pause or decipher the intended meaning, which aligns closely with the Band 5.5 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional clauses like 'If children allow to eat that what they like...'. However, control over grammar is weak, with frequent errors in voice, such as 'If children allow to eat', subject-verb agreement, and sentence fragments like 'For example: If parents allow to eat junk food daily over the home prepare food may be developed bad habit.' These frequent structural errors can cause difficulty for the reader, though the general meaning remains mostly decipherable.
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