Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There is an ongoing debate about letting their children make dicissions of their own choices on everyday matters such as food, cloth, and entertainment which might resulty in society of individuals who thinks abourt their own wishes. Some favour on this trend while other argue that they should only make the dicisions on the matters that affects them. In my view while, making an individuls society has some advantages but a proper decissions on their matters that affects them is better for children.

Those who support chgildren to make their own choices on everyday matters has a very attentive point to society of individuals . young children are likely make their choices in life can preperare them for the future independent personality. Supports also provide that they are likely to learn from their mistakes in life and move forward with proper basic experience that they need in life which results in early child development For example,critical thinking, modern custom and food likings. But in most of the cases they are likely to get spoiled as they will have no one to question them and they choose their own pth of freedom.

On the other hand, many people believe that it is more important for children to make decisions about matters that hamper their personal life. they are less experienced in the field of making proper and resultive conclusion which has a high probability of sucess. Kids can make dicissions on the things thats harming them and search for better option to enjoy the great entertainment of learning and experiencing also they are not likely to get undisciplined in the process.

In conclusion although giving them full right on making their own decession has some potential benefits for society. I am convinced that letting them make decisions on the factors that harm, them supports the overall development of the children.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both views on whether children should make their own everyday choices and providing a clear personal opinion. The writer establishes a position early and maintains it throughout the essay, concluding that letting children make decisions on matters affecting their personal development is beneficial. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. For instance, terms like 'early child development' and getting 'spoiled' or 'undisciplined' are mentioned without sufficient extension or concrete reasoning. While the task is adequately handled overall, the arguments lack depth and rely on sweeping generalisations rather than fully articulated examples, placing the response firmly at Band 6.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph structure representing introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, cohesion is frequently faulty and mechanical. The writer uses basic transition markers such as 'On the other hand' and 'In conclusion', but referencing within sentences is often unclear. For example, pronouns like 'they' and 'their' are used ambiguously, making it difficult to determine whether the writer is referring to the children, the parents, or society at various points (e.g., 'letting their children make dicissions of their own choices...'). Furthermore, logical progression within paragraphs is disrupted by confusing phrasing and punctuation issues, leading to an awkward flow. These mechanical cohesion faults and unclear referencing constrain the score to Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'independent personality', 'critical thinking', and 'resultive conclusion'. However, there are frequent spelling errors and inaccurate word choices throughout the text. Words like 'dicissions', 'cloth', 'resulty', 'preperare', 'Supports', 'pth', 'sucess', and 'decession' appear repeatedly. Additionally, collocations are sometimes unnatural, such as 'makes an individuls society' or 'has a very attentive point'. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the core meaning, the accumulation of spelling mistakes and awkward lexical choices restricts the score to Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some ambition in sentence structure through conditional and relative clauses (e.g., 'Some favour on this trend while other argue that...'). However, grammatical accuracy is weak. There are frequent errors in verb forms, article usage, and prepositions, such as 'young children are likely make their choices', 'Some favour on', and 'matters that affects them'. Punctuation is also problematic, including comma splices and misplaced commas, particularly in the introduction and conclusion. These frequent errors cause occasional difficulty for the reader and prevent the grammar from reaching a higher band level, though communication is ultimately maintained.

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