Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

While some people think that allowing minors to take their own decisions in everyday activitie such as food, clothes, and entertainment, is possibly to results in a society of some people that only think of their own wishes, others believe that it is vital for kids to make decisions concern the issues that affect them.

Overall, under age children making decisions about their daily activities regularly is more likely to make the child making a wrong decions that will harm him/ her in the future, in the other hand, it is important for a children to make his own decision while still younger because it will to train the child to stand every obstacles he will face when he grow up.

Furthermore, allowing a children to make his own wishes will make him to become self centered because he will be think that the world envolved around him alone, such a child might be making a decisons that may hinder his growth. For example, when an under age children make a decison on his own such as a clothes, the child may choose to wear any kind of dress he wish to because he believe no body have a say about him.

It is important to permit a child to make make choices that will affect them because it will help the child to think maturely more than their age mates. When a children chose what he eat, wear, or entertainment, his level of exposure will increase, this will give him a chance to be associating with people older than him. For instace, when a child make his own decision like food, it will be more easier for him to to feed when staying alone.

In conclusion, when a children make their own decisons, the might do some certain thing that they don't suppose to do because they will be think all about themself, while it is necessay for a child to make his own wishes because it will help them to be more enlighten.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both views required by the prompt, discussing the concern that independent children become self-centered alongside the view that autonomy prepares them for life. The writer also takes a clear position throughout the essay. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive, with arguments often restated rather than deeply extended. For instance, the discussion on food and clothing is introduced but lacks comprehensive elaboration to fully meet the higher band descriptors. Nevertheless, all parts of the task are addressed, placing the response solidly in the mid-range of performance for task achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay is divided into distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, fulfilling the basic requirements of paragraphing. However, progression is somewhat hindered by repetitive phrasing and awkward transitional markers such as 'in the other hand' instead of 'on the other hand'. Referencing is sometimes unclear, particularly with pronoun usage like 'a child... his... them'. While there is an overall attempt at a logical arrangement of ideas, the mechanical nature of the cohesive devices and occasional lapses in referencing prevent the response from achieving a higher score.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the student to communicate basic ideas about childhood independence, choice, and societal impact. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'under age children', 'decions', 'concern' instead of 'concerning', and 'envolved' instead of 'evolved' or 'revolved'. Less common lexical items are attempted, but they frequently contain errors, such as 'more easier' and 'enlighten'. These errors do not completely impede communication, but they restrict the lexical score to the mid-band level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, attempting various subordinate clauses. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, with frequent errors in verb forms, agreement, and tense consistency. Examples include 'minors to take their own decisions... is possibly to results', 'a children', 'the child making a wrong decions', and 'when a children chose what he eat'. Punctuation is also problematic, notably with run-on sentences containing comma splices. While simple sentences are generally understandable, attempts at complex structures frequently result in faulty grammar that requires some effort from the reader to decode.

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