Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

On the fence of the debate, some people agree that giving permission to children to make their own choices for matters like, food, entertainment and clothes can cause a bad result in society, as their will be more selfish individuals. While others oppose this, it i better and important for children to make decisions about matters affecting them.

In my opinion, giving freedom to children to make choices about their food, clothes and entertainment can make them selfish and it is also bad for the society, as there will be more individuals who only think about their own wishes. This will result to a lack of co-operation and understandability. Many people will face problems due to lack of co-operation, individuals will do whatever benefits them, despite the problems which will be created by it to the other people. Furthermore, individuals will not understand each other problems, and would not help each other.

However, several people believe that children should be independent for making choices that affect them. It can create confidence in them. Certain people who are not given the independence to make their own choices in childhood, cannot make choices on their own when grown up. Being dependent on someone else to make choices is bad, as the choice lack the preference. Choosing the everyday matters by the children on their own can lead to a society where individuals only think about their own wishes.

In conclusion, some people agree that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters like food, clothes and entertainment can result to a society where people only think about their wishes, while others oppose this, children should be independent to make their own choices.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses both views presented in the prompt and gives a clear opinion throughout the essay. The writer discusses the perspective that children making independent choices may lead to a self-centered society in the main body paragraphs, and also touches upon the counter-argument that independence builds confidence. However, the development of ideas is somewhat repetitive and lacks depth, particularly when discussing the consequences of selfishness, relying on circular phrasing such as 'individuals will do whatever benefits them'. While all parts of the task are addressed, the arguments would benefit from more specific examples or extended reasoning. Therefore, the response aligns best with the Band 6 descriptors for Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay is organised into four paragraphs, following a standard introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. There is a logical overall structure, with transitions such as 'In my opinion', 'However', and 'In conclusion' guiding the reader through the text. However, paragraphing and referencing are sometimes awkward; for instance, the third paragraph attempts to address the counter-argument but mixes it with confused reasoning, such as 'the choice lack the preference'. Additionally, cohesive devices are at times mechanical or repetitive, leading to occasional disruptions in the flow of ideas. Consequently, this performance fits the Band 6 level for Coherence and Cohesion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, using topic-related terms such as 'independence', 'entertainment', 'co-operation', and 'selfish individuals'. However, there are notable lexical errors and unnatural word choices throughout the text, such as 'on the fence of the debate', 'result to' instead of 'result in', and 'understandability' instead of 'understanding'. These inaccuracies do not entirely impede communication, but they restrict the score. The vocabulary is generally repetitive, lacking the precision and flexibility required for higher band levels. This places the response firmly at Band 5.5 for Lexical Resource.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some ambition in grammar usage. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, such as 'it i better', 'matters affecting them', 'the choice lack the preference', and 'Choosing the everyday matters by the children'. Punctuation is generally acceptable, and while these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points, they occur regularly enough to disrupt fluency and signal a lack of firm control over complex structures. This performance corresponds to a Band 5.0 in Grammatical Range and Accuracy.

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