Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In the modern world, everyone has a seperate choice and prefer to live as they wish. I personally believe that having your own will in matters so you can choose what is the best for you, regardless of the outcome of your decision.

If we talk about the former view, the assumption that making our choices in matters makes you selfish is invalid. Making your choices is crucial as it develops your personality and builds your confidence.However, the case is different if you are forcing another person to abide by your own choices and forcing your likes on him. That particular situation is actually an act of selfishness.

While reviewing the former view, making decision of matters that are affecting you is correct but to some extent. Children should make their own decisions as it enable them to deal with the consequences of their decision. For instance, choosing a right subject to study is very important decision of student's life, which if not choosed correctly may waste your efforts, time and money. But after making the decision of your choice. They should be able to have enough self confidence to stand by their decision.

From my perspective, having the ability to choose for yourself, helps you in many different way. It helps build your confidence, it has positive affects on your personality. Furthermore, it makes your mind more sharp for future decisions, making you more prepared for upcoming options and situations.

To sum up, in this era everyone has the right to express their will and their own likes and dislikes. It makes them strong for their future.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the task only partially, reflecting a limited approach to discussing both views. While the writer attempts to present an opinion and mentions both sides of the argument regarding children making their own choices, the ideas remain largely under-developed. For instance, the discussion around the first view briefly asserts that making choices is crucial for personality and confidence, but fails to properly unpack the counter-argument about selfishness. Similarly, the second perspective regarding children making decisions that affect them is introduced, but the supporting examples, such as choosing a subject of study, are underdeveloped and somewhat confused by shifts in pronoun use and clarity. The overall position is visible, but the lack of extended, fully supported arguments keeps the response at this level. To improve, the writer should ensure each viewpoint is given equal weight and expanded with clear, logical explanations and well-developed examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is some organisation within the essay, but it lacks a clear overall progression. Paragraphing is attempted, but the grouping of ideas is frequently disjointed; for example, the second body paragraph awkwardly blends a discussion of the first view with elements of the second. Furthermore, cohesive devices are often repetitive, inaccurate, or inadequately used, such as the frequent restarting of paragraphs with phrases like 'While reviewing the former view' or 'From my perspective', which do not accurately reflect the content that follows. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, particularly with pronoun shifts like moving from 'your efforts' to 'They should be able'. To move to a higher level, the writer needs to ensure a smoother, more logical progression of ideas from sentence to sentence and paragraph to paragraph, utilising a wider and more accurate range of cohesive devices without over-relying on mechanical formulas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey the basic message. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'consequences', 'personality', and 'confidence', but this is offset by noticeable errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'make decision of matters' instead of 'make decisions about matters', 'choosed' instead of 'chosen', and 'makes your mind more sharp' instead of 'sharpens your mind'. There are also minor spelling and phrasing awkwardnesses throughout the text, like 'seperate choice'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they cause some difficulty for the reader and restrict the precision of the argument. To achieve a higher band, the writer should focus on expanding their lexical repertoire, ensuring correct word forms, and using collocations more naturally and accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response displays a very limited range of structures, with frequent errors that can cause difficulty for the reader. While there are some attempts at complex sentences, these are often faulty in their construction and punctuation. Examples of errors include subject-verb agreement issues and awkward grammatical patterns, such as 'everyone has a seperate choice and prefer' and 'having the ability to choose for yourself, helps you'. Punctuation is also handled inconsistently, demonstrated by missing commas in dependent clauses and a stray full stop in the middle of a sentence ('confidence.However'). Frequent errors in prepositions and article usage further hinder grammatical accuracy. To improve, the writer needs to practise forming complex sentences with greater control, pay closer attention to basic rules of agreement and tense consistency, and refine punctuation to ensure smoother readability.

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