Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Many people think that, giving children chance to make their day to day life decisions is made children selfish and the others think that, elders should give the chance to make children's their own decisions. In my opinion we should balance both this activities within their lives. When they make their own decisions sometimes parents could not control them at some point of their lives. On the other hand, doing activities by their own improves the self esteem.
In today, most parents give chance to their children to make their own decisions such as grooming, eating and regarding lessure time activities. As an effect of this, most of the children do not ask the opinions from the parents following their daily activities. Sometimes they even do not take the permission before doing something. It may causes negative effect for their development. They may not concern about other's opinions as a result of this. As an example, the children in this generation has less empathy than our generations. We used to ask the permission from our parents before doing something.
On the other hand, practice to do the own things by their selfes has positive aspects as well. Because with this busy life-style most parents can not give the full attention for the children. So, if they can do their activities alone, it is very useful for parents. Also, it helps to improve the self confidance since childhood. It prepares children to grow even without parents help.
In conclusion, both aspects of allowing children to make their own decisions should be considerable. We need to consider both opinions that make the children selfish and make the children independant. We should control both the aspects to give the better thing to the children.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both views—that independent decision-making leads to self-centred individuals and that it is important for personal development—while also including a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, some ideas are under-developed or lack full explanation. For instance, the point regarding children having less empathy than previous generations is stated without sufficient supporting evidence or elaboration. While the overall stance is clear, the development of arguments is occasionally limited by superficial generalisations. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to extend and support all main points with more detailed explanations and relevant examples.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay has a coherent overall arrangement with a recognisable introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, showing a clear attempt to structure the discussion. Paragraphing is used adequately to separate distinct ideas, such as the negative effects in the second paragraph and the positive aspects in the third. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty. Devices like 'In today' and 'On the other hand' are used, but referencing within and between sentences lacks smoothness, and the logical progression between ideas stumbles slightly. To achieve a higher score, the writer must employ a wider and more flexible range of cohesive devices and ensure that referencing is consistently clear throughout the text.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, providing a minimally sufficient range to discuss the topic of child-rearing and decision-making. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'grooming', 'leisure time activities', and 'empathy', but this is accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, collocation, and word form. Examples include 'make their day to day life decisions is made children selfish' and 'self confidance'. These lexical inaccuracies and spelling slips do not completely impede communication, but they cause some difficulty for the reader. To improve, the writer should focus on precise word choices, correct word forms, and accurate spelling of common terms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and some complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional and subordinate clauses. However, there is a limited range of control, and frequent errors appear in basic patterns, verb forms, articles, and prepositions. Examples of grammatical lapses include 'giving children chance', 'is made children selfish', 'by their selfes', and 'with this busy life-style most parents can not give the full attention for the children'. These errors require effort from the reader to interpret the intended meaning. To reach the next level, the writer needs to produce a higher proportion of error-free sentences and demonstrate better command over basic grammatical rules and punctuation.
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