Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often argued by some people that allowing children to make their own dicision is result in a society in which own wishes are developed. Meanwhile, others argue that it is good to childern to make their own choices about yourself. However my opinion is that children make their own dicisions, it help them to grow independently.

On the one hand, the idea of children should not allowed to decide their food, clothes and entertainment believe that children are not mature enough and thus they learn from the childhood, what they do in this age they learn for the next. So, by giving freedom they developed a community where selfcare increase. Take an example of Germany where survey conducted in Atson School, which showed that 70% people adopt their nature from from their childhood and apply the same things in future which they adopt fromt their teenage. Hence, supporter of this view support their findings back their analysis with valid arguments.

While on the other hand, the advocates of the view that children should be allowed to make their own decisions believe that it encourage them and improve their well power. As when they take most of decisions on their own behalf they will be able to manage each and every situation during hard time and thus they become strong. For example, in china a basic decisions of their own life is made by own concern, also one subject is studied during their early education "how to make their own decision" due to this they are more active and strong. Thus, this view also seems to carry a lot weightage.

However, in my opinion children should make their own decisions instead of depending upon others. As they help them to grow independently and become strong, even if harder situation they will be able to manage this and solve the problems carefully due to this they become more powered.

To sum up, even though children make their own decisions in everyday matter result in self care society, I believe that making their own decision is good for their future wellness.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both views on children making everyday decisions and providing a personal opinion, which earns it a solid standing in the middle bands. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and uneven. For instance, the discussion on the first view mentions that children are not mature enough and introduces a study in Germany, but the reasoning remains slightly confused and under-developed, particularly with phrases like 'a community where selfcare increase.' The position is expressed throughout the essay, but the arguments lack depth and tend to rely on generalised assertions rather than well-extended examples, such as the brief and vague references to a school in Germany and a subject taught in China.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear paragraph-by-paragraph structure, including an introduction, two body paragraphs discussing opposing views, a supporting discussion of the writer's opinion, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used to signal the progression of ideas, such as 'On the one hand', 'While on the other hand', and 'However'. Nevertheless, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical. For instance, the transition in the final body paragraph feels repetitive, and pronouns referencing preceding clauses are occasionally unclear, such as 'As they help them to grow', where the antecedent is ambiguous.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common words and phrases like 'independently', 'mature enough', and 'weightage'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and word formation that restrict the score. Examples of lexical errors include 'make their own dicision is result in', 'good to childern', 'about yourself' instead of 'for themselves', 'selfcare', and 'well power' instead of 'willpower'. Additionally, spelling errors such as 'dicision' and 'childern' occur multiple times, although communication of the main ideas is generally maintained despite these flaws.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writing displays a limited range of grammatical structures, relying primarily on simple sentences alongside a few attempts at complex forms. These attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty, leading to noticeable structural errors. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'allowing children to make their own dicision is result in', missing articles, and awkward prepositional patterns or clause connections, such as 'the idea of children should not allowed to decide' and 'even if harder situation they will be able to manage this'. Frequent errors in grammar and punctuation are present throughout the text, occasionally causing some difficulty for the reader, though the core meaning usually remains retrievable.

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