Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Many people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters like food , clothes and entertainment make them selfish . and concerned about their desires only . Others, however, think that children should be encouraged to make decesion about the issues that affect them is important . In my perspective , children should be given some freedom but with appropraite guidance .
On the one hand , giving children full freedom may have many negatives consequences . Teenagers do not know the long term effect of their decesion . Such as , if they are allowed to choose whatever they want to eat , they may prefer eat only fast food , sweets and other unhealthy meals . Simmilarly , if they have option between physical activites like footbal , cricket or play video games watch telivison they may spend execessive amount of time telivision and videogames . Furthermore , constantly satisfying children's personal preference could encourage them to become self centred and less willing to consider the needs of others .
On the other hand, allowing children to make appropriate decisions make them responsible nad more independent . Making simple choices about their clothes , food , lesiure activities or hoobies gives them an opportunity to understand the consequences of their decisions . It can imprive their confiedence and self decesion skills .
In conclusion , giving too much freedom may encourage children's to focus excessively on their own wishes , giving them no choices at all can limit their independence . i believe the best approch is ton
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views on children making everyday choices and providing a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For example, the negative consequences of giving children full freedom are explored with relevant points about fast food and screen time, but the second viewpoint regarding independence is somewhat briefly supported and the conclusion trails off abruptly before finishing the sentence. The ideas presented are generally relevant to the prompt, fulfilling the core requirements of addressing both sides, though the overall development remains uneven across the body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into an introduction, two body paragraphs representing opposing views, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and referencing is not always clear, particularly with some awkward transitions and incomplete sentences at the very end of the essay. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are employed to guide the reader through the arguments, but the logical progression is occasionally disrupted by phrasing issues and abrupt endings.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The writer uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'consequences', 'self-centred', and 'independence'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text, including 'decesion' instead of 'decision', 'appropraite' instead of 'appropriate', 'Simmilarly', 'nad' instead of 'and', 'lesiure', 'hoobies', 'imprive', 'confiedence', and 'approch'. While these errors do not severely impede communication, they reflect an inconsistency in lexical accuracy and spelling control that prevents the score from reaching a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional and concessive clauses (e.g., 'if they are allowed to choose whatever they want to eat'). There are some errors in grammar, punctuation, and mechanics, such as unnecessary spaces before punctuation marks ('food , clothes'), sentence fragments, run-on structures, and awkward subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'everyday matters like food , clothes and entertainment make them'). Despite these errors in grammar and punctuation, they rarely impede overall communication, and the writer maintains a recognizable structure throughout most of the text.
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