Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Few people argue that a society will be created that will include individuals thinking about themselves only, if the children takes everyday decisions on their own while others think that children should take decisions about different matters that can affect their lives.

Life is full of experiences and emotions that can either be bad or positive for someone in our society. However, it is important to make sure decisions are taken at the correct time to avoid a negative situation. For example, robbery cases in the rural areas of Sindh are very common, especially during the dark and a person can safely travel from Karachi to Islamabad by road by dodging such situations if he decides to drive through the day and stop at night. In additon to this, individuals are exposed to a stronger willpower that enhances the ability to take good decisions resulting in more emerging leaders that can later lead a group of people for the betterment of the society. For instance, an individual living independantly since an early age is more experienced and confident helping him to reach a favourable conclusion rather than harming himself or others in the society that gives him an edge as people nearby can trust him and support his ideas, assuming him as a significant person that can later lead a society and propose ideas in the favour of the people.

In contrast to this, taking all the decisions alone damages the surroundings as no one interferes in any matter resulting in no harmony, losing the essence of living in a society. Suppose, everyone is taking decisions on their own while thinking about themselves rather than having a mindset of living in apartments in a society. Ahmed might throw his garbage in the route of other residents of the apartments just to keep his house clean causing problems for others while no one else will be making any rules or regulations to stop such acts causing a deteriorating situation to live near Ahmed.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response recognises both views: it argues that children’s decision-making can build independence and leadership, then contrasts this with the risk of people acting without regard for others. However, the discussion only partly addresses the specific question. The first body paragraph focuses largely on adults making decisions and travelling safely, rather than showing how children choosing food, clothes or entertainment develops responsibility. The second view is illustrated through an adult, Ahmed, disposing of rubbish, so the link to children’s choices also needs to be made explicit. Your position is not clearly stated: the introduction paraphrases the two views but does not say which you support, and there is no concluding judgement. Develop each side with child-focused reasoning and state your opinion directly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some paragraph organisation: the opening introduces the debate, the next paragraph presents benefits, and “In contrast to this” signals the opposing view. Examples also help make the ideas concrete. However, progression is difficult to follow because the first body paragraph moves from general experiences to robbery and road travel, then to leadership, without clearly connecting these points to children’s everyday choices. The final paragraph gives one example but ends without a summary or resolution of the debate. Some linking phrases, such as “In addition to this” and “For instance,” connect sentences mechanically rather than clarifying the argument. Use a clear structure—one paragraph for each view, followed by a conclusion—and make each example support its paragraph’s main point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of vocabulary to discuss social behaviour and consequences, including “willpower,” “harmony,” “favourable conclusion,” and “deteriorating situation.” These choices show an attempt to express more than basic ideas. However, several phrases are unnatural or imprecise, which sometimes makes the meaning harder to follow: “a stronger willpower,” “more emerging leaders,” and “in the favour of the people” are not idiomatic in these contexts. There are also spelling errors, including “additon” and “independantly.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and choose words that directly express the point. For example, “develop self-reliance” is clearer than “a stronger willpower” when describing the benefit of children making choices.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response attempts a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including conditional and relative structures, as in “if he decides to drive through the day” and “that can later lead a society.” This shows some range, and the overall meaning is generally recoverable. However, errors recur in agreement, articles, and sentence construction. For example, “the children takes” should be “children take,” while “a society will be created that will include individuals thinking about themselves only” is awkwardly structured. Several sentences are very long and contain multiple ideas joined without clear grammatical control, particularly the sentence beginning “For instance, an individual living independently…”. Break such sentences into shorter units and check subject–verb agreement, article use, and clause boundaries to improve accuracy and readability.

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