Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

There is an ongoing debate about whether children should be allowed to make their own choices on everyday matters or not. Others argue that those children will result in selfish people who will only think about their own choices. In my opinion, children should be allowed to make their own decisions about the things that affect them.

On the one hand, people believe that if children are allowed to make their own decisions, then they will turn out to be selfish individual who only thinks about their own choices. If children will be allowed from early age to think about themselves and take their own independent choices then will never learn to obey others and how to take other people's perspective and imply in their individual lives. They will always think that they are right every time in life without thinking of other individuals' wishes and needs. People need to adjust sometimes in life at different stages of life, whether living in a hostel or living with their partner, where you need to think of other people's wishes. Then those individuals who took their decisions in early childhood will suffer.

On the other hand, people argue that children should be allowed to make their own choices on everyday matters that affect them because it allows their brain to think independently without any external support. Children who were allowed to make their own choices eventually turned out to be very independent and empowered who do not need help from any other individual. This independent brain helps children in different stages of life whether they are going for job interview or deciding to learn new skill. I personally also believe that children should be allowed to make their own choices so that they can develop the sense of individuality that they do not need anyone in life and can deal with great challenges all alone.

In conclusion, it is very evident that there are two sides out there both have their valid arguments, but allowing children to make their own decisions outweighs the other opinion that thinks allowing children will result in selfish individuals. Being selfish does not only stems from strong individuality but also from other reasons such as bad childhood and many others.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and state your own position clearly: the introduction and conclusion support children making decisions about matters that affect them. The first body paragraph explains the concern that children may become self-centred, and the second gives reasons for encouraging independence, including later decisions about work and learning. These are relevant points, but some are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the claim that children who make early choices “will suffer” when living with a partner is not illustrated or qualified. Your argument for independence also risks equating it with not needing anyone. To strengthen the response, develop each view with a more balanced example and explain how children can make choices while also learning to consider others.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” make the contrast easy to follow, and your position remains consistent. However, some connections between ideas are mechanical or unclear. In the first body paragraph, the move from independent choices to hostel or partner life would benefit from an explicit explanation of how childhood decision-making affects later adjustment. The conclusion’s final point about selfishness arising from “bad childhood” introduces a new idea without developing its relevance. Use clearer links between claims and examples, and make the conclusion synthesise the discussion rather than add a fresh explanation.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough vocabulary to discuss the topic, including terms such as “independent,” “individuality,” “empowered,” and “perspective.” These help communicate the main ideas, but several choices are repetitive or imprecise, particularly repeated references to “choices” and “individuals.” Some collocations also sound unnatural, such as “imply in their individual lives” and “independent brain.” More precise phrasing would make the argument clearer and more natural. For example, you could describe children as learning to “consider other people’s needs” rather than “take other people’s perspective,” and use “develop decision-making skills” instead of “brain to think independently.” Aim to vary key terms while checking that phrases fit their intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and complex sentences, including conditional clauses and relative clauses, and the overall meaning is generally understandable. However, some errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction reduce accuracy. For example, “If children will be allowed” should use a present form after “if,” while “selfish individual who only thinks” needs plural agreement with “children.” In “then will never learn,” the subject is missing, and “Being selfish does not only stems” combines incompatible verb forms. Review conditional structures, subject–verb agreement, and how to form negatives. Breaking some long sentences into shorter, complete clauses would also help you express complex ideas more accurately.

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