Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is argued that letting younger generations to decide on basic needs and essentials which is required on everday basis will create selfish individuals in the community who can think only about their own wishes. Meanwhile some proportion of pupils think that self decision plays a vital role that will take a toll on them. In my opinion allowing children to make choices independently which not really result in raising careless or selfish individuals in the society, whereas it is more benefitial over letting them try and commit mistakes which can leads to further conflicts.

Letting children to choose what they want or like in terms of food, clothes and entertainment which they will have to do everyday leads to experiment leaning, one could feel the sense of freedom, understands their mistakes by making wrong decisions which could benefit later in their life. Allowing younger generations early, gives exposure to various fields of learning which contributes in making them wise.

For instance talk shows which interviewed few children shares how they became independent when given the freedom of choice they also help parents in many ways which is eye catching. There is no such examples where freedome directly depends on creating selfish people.

On the other hand, few believe that is significant for children to make choices about certain things that affect them later. Sometimes the choice made by children cause several problem which can directly affect them which is part of everyones childhood. A great example is the movie, The Jungle Book where character Mowgli takes controll and make wise choices in the entire film.

In conclusion, freedom of choice should be given to every child, however it has to be not fully left on them. By monitaring without any objections follwed by few suggestions can result in a responisble individuals.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You present a relevant opinion—that children should have freedom of choice, but with guidance—and you discuss benefits such as learning from mistakes and gaining independence. However, the two views are not explored with equal clarity. The opposing concern that children may become self-centred is mostly dismissed in “There is no such examples” rather than explained, and the paragraph about choices affecting children does not clearly develop that view. The Jungle Book example is also not convincingly connected to everyday decisions or their consequences. To strengthen the response, explain why some people fear unrestricted choice could encourage self-interest, then support your own position with a specific, realistic example and a clearer explanation of how parental guidance helps.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, separate body paragraphs and a conclusion, so the reader can identify its broad structure. However, progression within and between ideas is uneven. The first body paragraph moves from freedom and learning to talk shows without clearly showing how the example supports the point. The second paragraph begins with “On the other hand,” but its discussion of choices affecting children does not clearly represent the opposing view in the prompt. Some linking phrases, including “Meanwhile” and “For instance,” do not establish the intended relationship between ideas. The conclusion returns to the writer’s position, but “without any objections followed by few suggestions” is difficult to follow. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each example directly to the claim it illustrates.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “independent,” “freedom of choice,” “exposure” and “responsible individuals.” These choices show an effort to discuss the issue beyond very basic terms. However, several inaccurate word choices, collocations and spelling errors make parts of the argument difficult to interpret: “self decision,” “experiment leaning,” “take a toll on them,” and “eye catching” do not express the intended ideas naturally. Errors such as “everday,” “freedome,” “controll” and “monitaring” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, familiar expressions before reaching for less common wording, and check spelling carefully. More accurate phrases such as “learn through trial and error” would make your ideas clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses beginning with “which” and a contrast introduced by “whereas.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, verb forms and sentence construction recur. For example, “letting younger generations to decide” uses an incorrect verb pattern, while “one could feel the sense of freedom, understands their mistakes” shifts grammatical form within the sentence. In “talk shows which interviewed few children shares,” the subject and verb do not agree, and the clause is difficult to parse. The final sentence, “By monitaring without any objections follwed by few suggestions,” is also incomplete in structure. Practise building shorter, accurate sentences first, then combine ideas using controlled subordinate clauses and consistent verb forms.

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