Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some people believe that allowing to make their own choices on everyday matters is beneficial but other people argue that it can affect them.I will discuss about both the views after reach conclusion.

First of all, I want to discuss about allowing of childrens decision which is best. It is necessary for to take decisions by own self.I think it is the way of development and childrens take decision after their child hood easily. When they take decision it develop pain in their mind and it make self confident. It increase the ability of thinking.They can take good decisions on their up next life because ability of decision making should already in their blood and they can take good decision.

Secondly I would like to talk about the childrens which do not take decision by own self. From my prescription it is better for childrens because in childhood childrens have Borden of study and after that when they take decisions it witness Borden. When they have no burden they will always ready for any difficulty and they can solve it easily. In childhood childrens do not able to take right decision but when they have in their guardians supervision they grow in relaxation and it is already have physically and mentally preparedness.

In conclusion, I think if childrens take decisions by himself it is beneficial but on the other side when childrens depend on their guardians it is also Childrens can perform good in both situations and take good decisions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You attempt to discuss both views and state that children making decisions is beneficial, while also presenting a case for parental guidance. However, the discussion is only minimally developed: the first view is linked to confidence and decision-making ability, while the second mentions study pressure and guardians’ supervision, but these points are unclear and lack relevant examples. Your conclusion is difficult to follow and does not clearly resolve the contrast or restate your position. The response also falls 8 words short of the 250-word minimum; the 8 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. To improve, explain each view with a clear reason and a specific example, then give a direct, consistent opinion in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signposted with “First of all” and “Secondly,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader identify the two sides. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear, and several ideas are repeated rather than connected or developed—for example, the first paragraph repeats that children can make good decisions later. Linking phrases such as “after reach conclusion” do not clearly show the relationship between ideas, and the final sentence is incomplete in meaning. Use one main point per paragraph, explain it in a logical sequence, and use clear references and transitions rather than relying mainly on formulaic signposts.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “decision making,” “self confident,” “guardians supervision,” and “physically and mentally.” However, the range is basic and several inaccurate or unnatural choices make the meaning difficult to understand. For instance, “develop pain in their mind” appears to express a positive effect, while “Borden of study” and “from my prescription” do not convey the intended ideas. There are also spelling and word-form problems, such as “childrens” and “child hood.” Build a more precise set of topic phrases and check collocations and spelling; this will help you express your ideas without forcing the reader to infer your meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some longer sentences and use basic structures to compare the two views, but grammatical control is inconsistent and errors frequently make the message hard to follow. Examples include “allowing to make their own choices,” “It is necessary for to take decisions,” and “when they have in their guardians supervision.” Subject–verb agreement and sentence construction are also problematic in “it develop pain” and “it is already have physically and mentally preparedness.” The conclusion contains an incomplete construction: “it is also Childrens can perform good.” Practise forming complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement, articles, plurals, and punctuation before submitting.

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