Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Chilhood is the foundation of a person future character. some people argue that if children are allowed to make their own daily choices, such as what to eat, what to wear, and what to watch, they will become selfish adults. while, others believe that children should be allowed to make their decisions that affect them.

On one hand, there are reasons why some people think children should not be given too much freedom. if children always choose what they want, they may think only about themselves. for instance, a child who always eats junk food or buys expensive cloths may not to learn the respects the needs of others or the limits of a family budgets. this can leads to a society where people are self-centered and do not cooprate. parents always have more life experience, so their decisions are often healthier and more sensiblefor their childs.

On the others hand, allowing children to make their own choices has many advantages. it builds confidence and decisions making skills. when a child chooses their own cloths or their weekend activity, they learn to take responsibility for their choices. for instance, if they choose to spent their pocket money on a game and later regret it, it is a valuable lesson. and as well it teaches independence. a child who is never allowed to choose may become dependent on parents and unable to make decisions as an adults.

In my opinion, although there is a risk that children could become selfish if they have unlimited freedom, i believe the benefits of allowing them to make age-approoriate choices is greater.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and give a clear opinion: the first body paragraph explains concerns about excessive freedom, while the second presents benefits such as confidence, responsibility and independence. Your examples about junk food, family budgets and spending pocket money are relevant. This fits the task well, but some points are more fully explained than others. For example, the claim that unrestricted choices could create a self-centred society is asserted rather than clearly traced, and the first view could distinguish everyday choices from having unlimited freedom. Your final opinion is clear, but it would be stronger if you explained how parents can balance guidance with age-appropriate choice. Develop that reasoning to make the response more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a concluding opinion. The signposts “On one hand” and “On the others hand” help readers follow the discussion, and examples generally appear beside the points they support. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear. The sentence beginning “And as well it teaches independence” is awkwardly attached to the preceding example, and “while” in the introduction does not clearly connect the two positions. Use a wider range of linking and referencing, and make the relationship between each example and its main point explicit. Consistent paragraph development and clearer transitions would improve the flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “self-centered,” “responsibility,” “independence” and “life experience.” There are also attempts at more specific expressions, such as “family budgets” and “age-appropriate choices.” However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the phrasing less natural: “cloths” for “clothes,” “cooprate” for “cooperate,” and “decisions making skills” for “decision-making skills.” Some collocations also need attention, including “make their decisions” and “the respects the needs.” Build accuracy with common word partnerships and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise phrasing would make your ideas clearer and more fluent.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if children always choose what they want, they may think only about themselves” and a relative clause in “a child who always eats junk food.” These structures help express cause and consequence. Some grammatical errors remain, however, including “a person future character,” “they may not to learn,” “this can leads,” and “unable to make decisions as an adults.” Capitalisation and sentence boundaries are also inconsistent, with several sentences beginning in lowercase and “And as well” starting a sentence without a clear grammatical connection. Review possessives, verb patterns, subject–verb agreement and plural forms, then proofread punctuation. Greater control would make the varied structures more effective.

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