Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some individuals argue that if children are allowed to make their choices by their own may led to the formation of society of individuals who think only about themselves ,while others oppose this because they think that it is important for youngsters to take decisions about the matters that affect them .In my opinion, children should make their own choices about everyday life because this helps them to become more confident. However, parents should guide them to make sensible choice.

To begin with , the view that young ones should make decisions independently. It helps them to become more confident . To explain it, children learn to depend on themselves rather then relying on their parents .for example a child who make small decisions about his cloths and food may become more confident gradually in making everyday decisions. Additionally, they also learn about responsibility when they make their own decisions . When children make choices ,they learn to accept the consequences of their decisions .

Nevertheless, some people say that children may think only about their wishes if they make their own decisions. Children may become selfish if they always make their own choices because they may think that their wishes are always important than other people needs .for example a child may order food of his choice without asking family members. Furthermore, they may make choices without knowing the consequences of their decisions.Young people not always have the experience to make correct choice. Therefore, it may create a problem for them .for instance, a child may spend all his pocket money on toys without considering that he need it for something important in future.

In conclusion, i believe children should take some decisions by their own with the guidence of parents and adults .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both views and state a clear position: children should make everyday choices, with parental guidance. The first body paragraph explains confidence and responsibility, while the second presents the concern that children may become self-centred or make imprudent choices; the examples about ordering food and spending pocket money make these points relevant. This meets the task well, and the position is consistent. However, some ideas are more asserted than developed: for instance, the link between making choices and becoming confident could be explained further, and the conclusion mainly repeats your opinion rather than drawing the discussion together. To strengthen the response, explain how guidance can balance independence with consideration for others, and extend one or two examples to show their implications.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. The progression from benefits to possible risks is easy to follow, and signposts such as “To begin with,” “Nevertheless,” and “In conclusion” help identify the stages of the argument. This gives the essay a coherent arrangement. At times, however, linking feels mechanical, and some sentences are separated or joined awkwardly—for example, “To begin with, the view…” is followed by a fragment, “It helps them to become more confident.” The repeated use of “for example” and “Additionally/Furthermore” also makes cohesion less flexible. Connect related points more smoothly and use clear references, such as specifying what “it” refers to, to improve flow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “confident,” “responsibility,” “consequences,” and “selfish.” There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “matters that affect them.” However, the range is limited in places, with repeated use of “choices,” “decisions,” and “children,” and several inaccurate word forms or collocations reduce naturalness. Examples include “make their choices by their own,” “more important than other people needs,” and “correct choice.” Spelling errors such as “cloths” and “guidence” are also noticeable. Build a wider set of precise expressions for independence, parental support, and consideration for others, and check spelling and common word partnerships during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional clauses (“if they make their own decisions”) and subordinate clauses explaining consequences. The main argument remains understandable, but grammatical control is uneven, and errors occur in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation. For example, “if children are allowed to make their choices by their own may led” has an incomplete and faulty verb structure, while “a child who make” lacks subject–verb agreement. There are also sentence fragments, such as “To begin with, the view that young ones should make decisions independently,” and inconsistent capitalisation of “i.” Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and proofread for agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries.

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