Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowaday certain people belive that give freedom to children for making their own decision on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is led result where they became selfish and only think about their own wishes. However, other people belive that it is important for children. I agree with people who are concern about children who became selfish in future.

Numerouse people believe that children can became selfish after allowing them to make their own choicees because at the age of teenage few children have ability to understand the difference between right or wrong on the other hand most of the children takes advantage of the freedom and start making wrong decision that led them to think the people who are elder to them wants to degrade or controlling their life. However these kind of thinking made children selfish and more possisive about their own decision. For example one of my friend's parente don't interfare in the decision thats he makes but now if his parante gives any kind of order to him, he instantly rejects it.

Overall, there are people present who believe that is is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them because those people think that if a child make wrong choice it will work as a life lession. Moreover, its make them independent and strong. Although, lots of children do not understand this knowledge and some end-up ruining their own life.

In my opinion parants who wants their children to became good person for the society will not allowing them to make thier own choices on everyday. Parants have to take full responsiblity of their own child decicion and make teach them about what is right or wrong to them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both perspectives: you explain the concern that freedom may encourage selfishness, then mention that making choices can teach children from mistakes and build independence. Your opinion is also present, particularly in the conclusion, where you argue that parents should guide children’s choices. However, the discussion is only partial and the position is not fully clear: the opening says you agree with people concerned about selfishness, while the later paragraph acknowledges benefits without clearly explaining how these views are balanced. The example about your friend illustrates resistance to parental instructions, but its connection to everyday choices and the wider argument needs explanation. Develop each view with a clearer reason and a more directly relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has recognisable paragraphs for the introduction, opposing views and conclusion, and the reader can generally identify the topic of each. However, progression between ideas is uneven. The paragraph beginning “Overall” introduces the second view after a long paragraph on the first, but “Overall” suggests a conclusion rather than a new point. Linking phrases such as “However” and “Moreover” are used, yet some connections are unclear or repetitive, and the conclusion repeats the parental-control position without resolving the earlier contrast. Improve the sequence by giving each viewpoint its own focused paragraph, using transitions that accurately signal contrast or addition, and making references such as “these kind of thinking” clearer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “freedom,” “selfish,” “independent,” and “responsibility,” so the main ideas are usually understandable. However, the range is limited and several spelling, word-form and collocation errors make the writing less clear or natural. Examples include “Numerouse,” “possisive,” “parente,” and “decicion”; phrases such as “work as a life lession” and “degrade or controlling their life” are also awkward or imprecise. These issues sometimes make the reader pause to interpret your meaning. Build a more accurate range for discussing parenting and development, and check spelling and common word partnerships. For instance, “learn from mistakes” is more natural than “work as a life lesson” in this context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “because” and “although,” and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently, especially in verb forms, agreement and sentence construction. For example, “allowing them to make their own choices … is led result” does not form a correct clause, while “most of the children takes” has a subject–verb agreement error. “If a child make wrong choice” also needs agreement and an article, and “will not allowing them” uses the wrong verb form. Some long sentences combine several ideas without clear punctuation, making relationships harder to follow. Practise accurate clause patterns and check each sentence’s subject, verb and tense.

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