Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Allowing children to have autonomy is a lifelong debate that has been argued across many generations, cultures, and individuals. While some subscribe to the notion that it creates adults thaat are self-sufficient and independents, others argue that it only makes adults selfish and only considerate of themselves.

I am of the opinion that allowing children be autonomous is a great way to train a child. This is because a child who knows what he wants and is guided by his parents to safety on such matters is more likely to become an adult that is not clinging to recklessness at the first sight of freedom they get. Many chikdren, including myselg, were heavily sheltered as children. As aresult, when I first tasted autonomy in the university, I went off the rails, doing all and everything I could to be selfish. Allowing a child to make decisions on simple or even complex matters shows them that it is their life and no one gets to run it for them. Raising a child with autonomy, furthermore, makes an adult that is confident in their decisions, learns from terrible choices and is not afraid to reach out to the parents that have nurtured them so without fearing harsh rebuttals or judgement. Caution and guidance is paramount, of course, but it should never come at the cost of autonomy.

The argument that autonomous children often turn out to be selfish, while valid, is flawed still. Research suggests that it is in the human nature to be selfish in some things, regardless of whether or not you were granted autonomy as a child. And while it is necessary to be selfless in some situations, it must not be misconstrued with kindness; I can be kind towards others and still put myself first. Training a child without letting them have a say - more often than not - makes an adult that is either too extreme in what they do when they can make their own decisions or one who calls mummy every single time they are in a pickle; the result is that the parent never catches a break - they keep raising a 3 year-old that is actually 32.

Both sides matter. But with the correct amount of guidance, caution and showing your child that it is okay to make their own choices (good or bad), an autonomous child turns out to be a well-adjusted adult that is kind, confident in their decisons, and selfless when required but not stupid.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

You address both views and maintain a clear position: you argue that children benefit from autonomy when it is paired with parental guidance. The personal example of becoming “selfish” after being heavily sheltered supports your reasoning, and you also explain the opposing concern before challenging it. This meets the task well, with relevant ideas extended through consequences such as confidence and learning from poor choices. To strengthen the response further, develop the opposing view with a more specific explanation or example; the reference to research is broad and unsupported, and the claim that selfishness is human nature is generalised. Clarifying how everyday choices can foster consideration for others would also make the discussion more balanced and fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall shape: an introduction, a paragraph supporting autonomy, a paragraph addressing the concern about selfishness, and a concluding position. Ideas generally progress logically, and signposts such as “The argument,” “Furthermore,” and “Both sides matter” help readers follow the discussion. The personal example also gives the second paragraph a recognisable line of development. However, some connections are abrupt or imprecise: “The argument … while valid, is flawed still” moves quickly into a broad claim about human nature, and the final paragraph largely repeats earlier points rather than synthesising them. Use clearer links between claims and evidence, and make references such as “it” and “they” more explicit where their meaning could be uncertain.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.5

You use a reasonably varied vocabulary for the topic, including “autonomy,” “self-sufficient,” “sheltered,” “well-adjusted,” and “harsh rebuttals.” These choices help express nuanced ideas about independence and parenting, and the informal phrase “went off the rails” conveys your personal experience vividly. At times, however, word choice or collocation is inaccurate or too conversational for an academic essay. Examples include “clinging to recklessness,” “all and everything,” and “calls mummy,” while “selfless” is not quite the same as considerate or empathetic. Spelling slips such as “thaat,” “chikdren,” and “decisons” also reduce control. Aim for precise, consistently appropriate phrasing and proofread carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.5

You attempt a useful mix of sentence forms, including complex clauses such as “While some subscribe to the notion…” and “Although” is not needed to understand your argument because you also use structures with “because,” “when,” and “that.” Most sentences remain understandable, and punctuation generally helps organise longer ideas. Some grammatical errors persist, however. For example, “allowing children be autonomous” needs “to be,” and “a child … is more likely to become an adult that” would be more naturally formed with “who.” The sentence beginning “Raising a child with autonomy … makes an adult that is confident … learns” has an unclear structure and inconsistent parallelism. Review verb forms, relative clauses, and sentence construction, especially in longer sentences, to improve accuracy.

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