Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In this essay, we will discuss different perspective of parents about how important it is to gave freedom to children. Some individuals think that if they allow their juveniles to make choices they will became selfish and will only priortize their desires. However, many people believe that its vital for their children to allow them to make decision about the things that will affect their lives. In my opinion, I truely agree with the fact that we should give freedom to our children so that they will become independent and are well trained to make their important life decisions.However, parents should guide them and assist their little ones to teach them whats good for them.

On one hand, If parents allow their youngsters to make decisions about their daily routines for instance when they visit restaurant, they are allowing them to order food of thier own choices or if they go out for a shopping, they are allowed to select dresses as per their will. In this way parents are training their children to make decisions and when they became adults, they will not depend upon others to make decision, they will be self sufficient to choose what would be good for them.

On the other hand, if children start making their decision, they will only focus on their needs and only wished for the fulfilment of their desires.This would also be destructive for juveninles beacuse they dont care about other perspective and would not listen to other advices which might be helpful for them.

In conlusion, as per my opinion it is beneficial for juveniles to have freedom to make choices but under parents guidence. In this way, they will always open for healthy disucssions about what is good or bad for them and then make decisions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and state a clear opinion: children should have freedom, with parental guidance. The examples of choosing restaurant food and clothes are relevant and help explain how everyday decisions can build independence. You also present the opposing concern that children may focus only on their own desires. However, this concern is asserted rather than developed: explain how unrestricted choices might affect consideration for others, perhaps through sharing or family decisions. The benefits are also somewhat general; a specific example of a child learning from a choice would strengthen the reasoning. Overall, the response covers the task, but the two sides are not explored equally fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “On one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow, and the final paragraph returns to your position. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger organisation. To improve further, make links between ideas less formulaic and clarify references: for example, “This would also be destructive” does not specify exactly what “this” refers to. The first body paragraph also combines two examples and their consequences in one long sentence; dividing it would make the reasoning easier to track.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “independent,” “self sufficient,” “fulfilment of their desires,” and “healthy discussions.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and some less common terms are attempted. However, noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, including “priortize,” “juveninles,” “conlusion,” and “guidence.” Some expressions are also unnatural or repetitive: “make decisions” and “make decision” recur, while “allow them to make decision about the things” is awkward. Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise wording would help distinguish reasonable independence from selfishness.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if parents allow their youngsters…” and a contrast introduced by “However.” The main message remains understandable, but some errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries affect accuracy. For example, “to gave freedom” should use the infinitive form, and “they will became adults” needs the correct verb form after “will.” In “it is vital for their children to allow them,” the structure does not clearly express who is allowing whom. There are also run-on sentences and missing spaces after full stops. Review verb patterns and break longer sentences into controlled clauses.

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