Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often argued that youngsters who are allowed to manage themselves their daily task like their meals, clothes, and other outdoor activities make them selfish who's concern only in theri own wishes, while others argue that it is essential for children to make decisions themselves. Although, making decisions without any guidence has some drawbacks, I believe that children should be allowed to decide their daily routine task by themselves because it helps to develope independency and ability to survive in foreign nations.

To commence with, why some people believe that youngsters ability to make their decisions themselves result a society of individuals who think only about their own wishes, the most significant reason is selfishness. To explain it, when a child is allowed to decide his everyday tasks especially purchaisng clothes and food, he consider himself a mature person who do not need any help by elders. Due to which he never think about others, and encurage him to be more selfish person. Furthermore, the ability of making own choices also creates a berrier between children and elders especially their parents. For example children in metropolitan areas do not know how to respect their elders because they consider them just members. Consequently, allowing children to make their own choices results in a selfish society.

However, those who consider that young generation should encourage to make their own choices to raise an independent society. This is because, if children make their own choices by themselves, they will help them to become independent and confident person in the future. Moreover, the ability of making own choice also helps children to survive in a place far from thier resident. For instance, in developing countries especially in Japan individuals are allowed to decide their daily matters by themselves, which raised independent society. As a result, it is crucial for youngsters to mange all their meals and other task by themselves for healthy and independent life.

In conclusion, Although, allowing children to decide their daily tasks rasie selfish individuals, it establishes an independent society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and give a clear opinion: you acknowledge the risk of selfishness, then argue that children’s choices can build independence and confidence. The response stays relevant, and the examples about family relationships and living away from home help illustrate your points. However, some ideas are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, the claim that children who choose food or clothes “never think about others” needs a clearer link between everyday choice and selfish behaviour. The Japan example is also broad and does not show specifically how children’s decisions produce an independent society. Develop these points with more precise reasoning or a concrete example, and make the comparison between guidance and freedom clearer.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion that restates your position. Signposting such as “To commence with,” “Furthermore,” and “However” makes the main stages easy to follow. At times, though, cohesion feels mechanical, and some references are unclear. In “Due to which he never think about others,” the connection to the previous sentence is awkward, while “they will help them” leaves the reader unsure who is helping whom. The conclusion also repeats the two outcomes without clearly resolving how they can be balanced. Use linking phrases more selectively and make pronouns and cause-and-effect links explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “selfishness,” “independent,” “confident,” and “society.” There are also attempts at less common expressions, but inaccurate word choice, collocation, word forms, and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less clear. Examples include “manage themselves their daily task,” “ability to survive in foreign nations,” and “raise an independent society”; these do not sound natural in context. Spelling errors such as “guidence,” “purchaisng,” and “thier” also reduce accuracy. Build a more reliable range by learning common word partnerships and checking spelling, rather than choosing ambitious phrases that do not fit the intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “when,” “because,” and “if,” and the overall meaning is usually understandable. However, errors in sentence structure, verb forms, agreement, articles, and punctuation occur across the response. For example, “when a child is allowed … he consider himself” has a subject–verb agreement error, and “those who consider that young generation should encourage” is structurally incomplete. The opening sentence also combines clauses in a way that makes the relationship between them difficult to follow. Practise building accurate complex sentences, especially with conditional clauses and reported viewpoints, and check each sentence for a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

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