Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some people believed that allowing the children to make their own choices in everyday life can lead to spoil the children.It is often argued that granting permissing to children to make their their own decisions is not good . Because by doing so children can become very independent and this can lead to make them naughty. By making the children free to make the decisions in the early life can lead to mislead the children.He can become a rude and very ignorant person. he can addopt a wrong friends company which can lead to destroy his future.

On the other hand it has many advantages also like children become very sharp and intellegent by making thier own choices.If a child is allowed to do make the choice of his own will he can grow mentally very well and it also helps in the future decisions.A person who is making his own choices in daily life is more persistant than those who were not able to make their choices. so the chances of becoming successful in future are high for those who have been making the decisions of their ow life since their childhood.On the other hand those who were not be able to make their own decisions face more difficulties in making the life choices.

It is also a noticeable thing that the children who are not allowed to make the decisons of the daily life become stressed.They find difficulty to share the problems with their parents.

So it is necessary to look at the children will by both sides.we should look how will it effect the life of our children by making them free to make their daily life desicions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both views: the first paragraph argues that too much freedom may lead to poor behaviour, while the next presents benefits such as independence and stronger decision-making. Your final paragraph also signals that children’s choices should be considered carefully. However, the discussion remains general and the position is not fully clear: the conclusion does not say directly whether you support children making everyday decisions, or how much freedom is appropriate. Several claims, such as children becoming “naughty” or more likely to succeed, are asserted without explanation or a relevant example. Develop each view with a specific reason or illustration, then state your own opinion clearly and consistently.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with one paragraph for each view and a concluding paragraph, and phrases such as “On the other hand” help signal a change in direction. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because several claims are placed together without showing how they connect. The repeated use of “On the other hand” is also confusing, as it introduces both the opposing view and a later point about children who lack choice. Some references, including “He” and “those,” are not always clearly linked to a specific group. Use clearer topic sentences, organise each paragraph around one main idea, and connect reasons to their consequences more explicitly.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a basic range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “decisions,” “independent,” “successful,” and “stressed,” so the main ideas can generally be understood. However, vocabulary is repetitive, and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make parts of the argument unclear, such as “granting permissing,” “wrong friends company,” and “look at the children will.” There are also frequent spelling and word-form errors, including “intellegent,” “persistant,” and “desicions.” Aim to use precise phrases for the ideas you discuss—for example, parental guidance, peer influence, and emotional wellbeing—and check spelling and collocations carefully during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences using clauses and linking words, for example, “If a child is allowed to do make the choice of his own will he can grow mentally very well.” However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and attempts at complex sentences often contain errors that make the meaning harder to follow. Examples include “can lead to spoil the children,” “He can become a rude,” and “those who were not be able to make their own decisions.” Sentence boundaries and punctuation are also inconsistent, with missing spaces after full stops and lower-case sentence openings such as “he” and “so.” Practise accurate verb patterns, articles, and complete sentence construction before adding more complex clauses.

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