Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

In the era of modernization,few individuals think that childrens should be independent only to their chioces in goods, attire and meal. But every coin has two sides. So many of them say that infants should make their decisions by their own because it is important for their fostering independence. in my opinion, allowing childrennto make personal choices is crucial for their development, provided it is guided by parental oversight.

On the one hand, if we give freedom to children then that children could be mean by the time passes throug

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

You introduce the topic and give a recognisable opinion: “allowing children to make personal choices is crucial for their development,” with parental oversight as a qualification. You also begin to address the concern that freedom could have negative effects. However, the response does not develop either view or provide reasons and examples, and the second view—that children should decide matters affecting them—is not clearly explained. The final sentence is incomplete (“could be mean by the time passes throug”), so the discussion cannot be followed to a conclusion. The response is 90 words, below the required 250. To improve, explain both perspectives, support each with a relevant example, and complete the essay with a clear conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: the opening introduces the issue and opinion, and “On the one hand” signals the start of a discussion. “But every coin has two sides” also indicates that more than one perspective will be considered. However, the response ends during its first body point, so there is no developed progression between the two views or a concluding paragraph. Some connections are unclear, particularly “So many of them,” whose reference is uncertain, and the unfinished final sentence prevents the reader from understanding the intended point. Build a clear sequence with separate paragraphs for each view, use linking phrases that show precise relationships, and finish with a conclusion that restates your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “independent,” “choices,” “fostering independence,” and “parental oversight,” and these phrases show an effort to express the issue beyond very basic terms. However, several word choices and spellings make the meaning difficult to understand: “childrens,” “chioces,” “attire and meal,” and “infants” are inaccurate or unsuitable in context. “Mean” in “could be mean” may not express the intended consequence of giving children freedom, and “goods” is vague for everyday choices. The range is limited because the response is very short and ideas are not elaborated. Practise accurate collocations and use precise terms such as “children,” “food,” and “clothing” when describing everyday decisions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both a complex conditional structure—“provided it is guided by parental oversight”—and a contrastive opening with “But,” showing some variety beyond simple statements. However, grammatical control is inconsistent. The opening contains a run-on construction (“In the era of modernization,few individuals think…”), and “children should be independent only to their choices” has an unclear grammatical relationship between the words. The final clause, “if we give freedom to children then that children could be mean by the time passes through,” contains problems with articles, agreement, verb forms, and sentence completion. Punctuation and spacing are also inconsistent. Work on complete sentence patterns, subject–verb agreement, and conditional clauses, then proofread each sentence to ensure its meaning is complete.

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