Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some people believe that by giving permission to their children on daily routine work could be resulted into a community that only focus on their wishes and become selfish, while other believe that they should be careful about their dicisions that affects them. This assay will discuss the both views and I will give my own opinion at the end.

Although, allowing young people to make their own decisions will help them in some extent, however, this tend to the generation who becomes selfish and thinks only for their own preferences. For instance, if you allow a child to make their daily routine taks such as selecting something from the super market or shopping from a brand, te child only consider the things which are essential to him rather than he he thinks about other problems. Consequently, such type of individulas only consider the things which are related to them. This has impact detrimental effects on the society.

On the other hand, critics that argue that children should make their decisions meticuosly. This will help them for shapping their future and they will become more responsible and careful. For example, when the parents keep an eye on their children what is he doing or where he going?. When the child will be able that he

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The response identifies both views and begins to state a position, but it does not fully address the task. The first body paragraph explains the concern that children may become self-centred, using shopping as an example. The second view is only briefly introduced: the point that decisions can help children become responsible is not developed, and the example ends mid-sentence (“When the child will be able that he”). Your own opinion is promised in the introduction but is never clearly given. The response also contains 215 words, below the required 250, which leaves important ideas and support incomplete. To improve, finish the second argument, state your position directly, and explain each point with a complete, relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, one paragraph for the concern about selfishness, and a paragraph beginning to present the opposing view. Connectors such as “For instance,” “Consequently,” and “On the other hand” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, progression is limited because the second body paragraph stops before its example is completed, and the promised conclusion and opinion are absent. Some linking is also mechanical or confusing: “Although” and “however” are used together, while “On the other hand, critics that argue” does not form a clear transition or sentence. Develop each paragraph around one complete point, use clear references, and add a concluding paragraph that answers the question.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The response uses some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “daily routine,” “preferences,” “responsible,” and “society,” and the reader can generally identify the intended ideas. However, the range is limited and several word choices, collocations, and spelling errors make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “daily routine work,” “meticuosly,” “shapping,” and “individulas”; “the child only consider the things which are essential to him” is also imprecise and repetitive. Aim for more natural topic-specific expressions, such as “everyday decisions,” “consider others’ needs,” and “develop independence.” Proofread spelling and choose precise phrases so that your examples communicate the intended meaning clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a conditional example beginning “if you allow a child” and a contrast between the two views. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction can make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “other believe” should have subject–verb agreement, and “the child only consider” also needs an agreeing verb. The opening sentence has an unclear construction (“could be resulted into”), while “When the child will be able that he” is incomplete. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check agreement and tense before adding subordinate clauses.

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