Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The idea of allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as: food, clothes and entertainment has become a considerable debate. People have been divided into two catagories, first are the one that thinks that this behaviour results in society of individuals who become selfish in their own wishes and other thinks that this is necessary for the kid to develop the sense of self esteem.

In my opinion, children should be allowed to make their own decisions but to an extent of their knowledge. For instance: a child should not decide in which city he wants to live but he should be the one to choose what to do on the weekend. That way the kids will learn decision making in life as well as their confidence will be developed. But the kids are not mature enough to take crutial decisions of life so they should be supervised by their parents/guardians. That way they will also learn critical thinking and taking suggestions from other people.

However, people who beleive that children should be strictly supervised and kids should obey without thinking, that way kids loose their self esteem and the capability to think freely and this creates submisive individuals who are not beneficial for society. Children learn cognitive thinking by taking decisions in their life, but whenever they get misguided by their decision, they should be corrected by an adult so they develop a sense of learning and they can be humble.

Summing that up, both opinions have some strong grounds to stand on so if the loop holes can be filled collectively then the upbringing of children would be more affective and beneficial for society. Children are the main assets for the future so they should be raised right.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and give a clear position: children should make everyday decisions within limits set by their maturity. The contrast between choosing weekend activities and deciding where to live makes your opinion relevant, and you explain that guided choices can build confidence and decision-making skills. However, the opposing view is not fully explored: you mainly describe the risks of strict supervision rather than explaining why some people fear that choice may encourage self-centred behaviour. Several points, such as children learning humility or becoming “beneficial for society,” are asserted without a specific example or fuller explanation. Develop both sides more evenly and show how your examples support each claim.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, moving from the issue and your position to supporting discussion and a conclusion. Paragraphing helps distinguish the main stages, and connectors such as “For instance,” “However,” and “Summing that up” signal relationships between ideas. At times, though, progression is less clear because several points are packed into long sentences, and the discussion shifts from children’s choices to strict obedience without a clear transition. The conclusion introduces “both opinions” and “loopholes” without specifying how the views can be combined. Use clearer topic sentences, link each explanation directly to the relevant view, and make references such as “this behaviour” and “that way” more precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic-related vocabulary, including “self-esteem,” “decision making,” “critical thinking,” and “cognitive thinking.” These terms help communicate the central ideas, and some less common choices show an attempt to express abstract concepts. However, several word-choice, collocation, and spelling problems reduce precision: “catagories,” “crutial,” “beleive,” “loose,” and “submisive” are misspelled, while “a considerable debate” and “fill the loop holes” are not natural in context. “Affectively” also does not convey the intended meaning of “effectively.” Proofread spelling and learn common collocations, then choose precise terms for the social outcomes you describe.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses with “but,” “so,” and “whenever,” and your meaning is generally understandable. Some grammatical and punctuation errors remain. For example, “People have been divided into two catagories, first are the one…” joins ideas with a comma and has problems with number and sentence structure; “other thinks” also lacks a plural subject. The opening list is punctuated awkwardly after “such as,” and “children should be allowed … but to an extent” is not a complete parallel construction. Break long sentences into clearer units, check singular and plural agreement, and use punctuation to separate independent clauses.

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