Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some people believe that children should allow to make their own wish on everyday every matters like food, cloths and other things . They could allow to according to you enjoy our life. The children that they think only about on your own wishes. Other people think that it is important for children to make a decisions about every matters that effect on their life.

Some people think that children allow to give permission on every work. They could not stop to any body. They could allow to choice everybody that they own wishes. Children allow to spend life according to their mindset. It can cause of many bad habits like in his child life they cannot know how is good or bad for me. They can do anything to get some thing.

Other people thing that children sharing everything with there parents or discuss with the family. Their parents give him advice about our decision. They can effect on our daily life . Because parents cannot thing that their children face any difficult. If the children share every good or bad habit with their parents ,that can cause of society improve . Every children share every matters with their parents that effected on our life.

In my opinion , Children should not allow everything. Parents should stop to bad habit that children wish to get. Parents allow all those thing that build children physically fit and mantely fit. For example, children allow to make new friends and play some physically games . Children never stop to every things parants allow something and stop some thing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You attempt to discuss both views and give your opinion, so the response is relevant to the question. You explain that unrestricted choice may lead to bad habits and that parents can advise children, then state that parents should allow some choices while preventing harmful ones. However, the two views are not clearly or fully explained: the first paragraph largely repeats the idea of children following their wishes, and the discussion of parental guidance is difficult to interpret. The example about making friends and playing games supports your opinion, but it is not developed to show why these choices are beneficial. Make each viewpoint explicit, explain its consequences, and support your position with a clearer example. The response meets the required length; eight words copied from the task prompt were excluded from the count.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a basic paragraph structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a concluding opinion. This gives the reader some sense of how the answer is organised. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear, and ideas are repeated rather than developed—for example, the first two paragraphs repeatedly say children may choose according to their wishes. Connections between points are also weak, and references such as “they,” “our,” and “their” make it difficult to tell whose decisions or experiences are meant. Use a clear topic sentence for each view, then explain and illustrate it in a logical sequence. Check pronoun references and use linking expressions only where they accurately show the relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use basic vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “parents,” “bad habits,” “decision,” and “physically fit,” and the reader can identify the general subject of each paragraph. However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, especially “every,” “allow,” “children,” and “wishes.” Some inaccurate word choices and spelling errors make meaning harder to follow, as in “cloths,” “effected,” and “mentaly fit.” Phrases such as “allow to choice everybody” and “stop to bad habit” are not natural ways to express the intended ideas. Build a topic vocabulary for guidance, independence, and responsibility, and learn common word partnerships. Proofread spelling and choose precise expressions rather than repeating general words.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to form longer sentences using clauses, including “If the children share every good or bad habit with their parents…” and “Because parents cannot thing that their children face any difficult.” This shows an effort to connect ideas, but the structures are often incomplete or inaccurate, and most sentences rely on simple patterns. Errors in verb forms and sentence construction occur in examples such as “children should allow to make,” “They could allow to according to you enjoy our life,” and “Parents allow all those thing.” Articles, plurals, agreement, and punctuation are also inconsistent. Practise complete subject–verb structures and accurate patterns such as “allow children to choose” and “parents should prevent children from developing harmful habits.” Then check each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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