Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people argued that the children who take their own decisions will be selfish in nature after grown up while others thinks that making decisions on their own turn them into independent. In this particular essay ,we look into both views elaborately and give my opinion.

On the one hand, when kids make their own choice upon everyday things ,such as food, clothes, and entertainment, they don't like interferance of other individuals on their choices. Furthermore, when others give advises youngers don't like them and also ignore them. As a result, youngers bound to make choice for own wishes. Thus, turn a society into a selfish society where individuals only prioratize their own intension. For example, when person used to take their own decisions they become willfull and don't pay attention to others in society.

On the other hand, when young people make their own decisions in everyday life it carries a significant role for their upcoming future. In addition, it also helps them to be independent when chosing their carrier. Thus, they can have a life with their preferances. As a result, they have the freedom for their choices and also assists people to make choices. For instance, when a person enjoy freedom other people also want to know how to gain freedom which help the person to teach other people about making their own decision. From my perspective, it is essential for children to make own decisions under any circumtances for their future.

In conclusion, taking own decisions from childhood helps to grow people with more independence, confidence and responsibility. In contrast, making own choices turn people into that kind of person who are not helpful to others in society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state your position: the first body paragraph links children’s choices with selfishness, while the second argues that decision-making builds independence. The conclusion also makes your preference clear. However, the discussion is only partly developed. The claim that children may ignore advice and become selfish is asserted rather than explained, and the example about a person becoming “willfull” does not show a specific consequence. The benefits are also broad: choosing a career is mentioned, but the connection between everyday choices and future independence needs clearer explanation. Develop each view with a concrete, relevant example and explain how it supports your point; this would make the response more fully address the task.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the basic direction. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because ideas are repeated or linked mechanically. In the second body paragraph, the sequence from having freedom to teaching others about decision-making is not clearly explained. Some references, such as “they” and “the person,” are also vague. Organise each paragraph around one main claim, then add an explanation and a directly relevant example. Use linking expressions to show precise relationships rather than simply adding another sentence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “independent,” “freedom,” “responsibility,” and “prioritize,” and you attempt more formal expressions such as “significant role.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning less clear. For example, “take their own decisions” and “make choice for own wishes” are not natural ways to express the intended ideas; “interferance,” “preferances,” and “circumtances” also contain spelling errors. Repetition of “choices,” “decisions,” and “freedom” further limits variety. Build a small set of accurate topic collocations and check spelling and word forms, while keeping the language natural and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including clauses beginning with “when” and “while,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, control is inconsistent, and errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. Examples include “others thinks,” “when a person enjoy freedom,” and “which help the person”; these need subject–verb agreement. The opening sentence also shifts awkwardly between “Some people argued” and “others thinks,” while “Thus, turn a society…” is an incomplete sentence. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and verb, consistent tense, and complete clause structure. More accurate control of these basics will make your ideas easier to understand.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.