Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In today's world, many people believe that allowing youngster to make their own choies on everyday of their life such as food, cloths and entertainment. However, in many urban area individuals only think about their own decisions. Whereas, other argue that it is vital for pupils to make decisions which affect obstacle issues. I will Discuss both side of view before the tarminate.

To commence, students nowadays have best opportunities to enjoy with variety of different iteams likewise hang-out with friends, enjoying to bought new shirt and T-shirt. Moreover, many people at present purchasing luxury colths and pacific healthy food in the resturants. Consequently, parents are allowing to their child to make good decisions by yourself and enjoy with their freedom. For instance, In London many Scholar today are taking their own opinion because they were trying to developed their communication skills. As a result, in many urban society residents they only focusing their own wishes to complete.

On the other hand, many experts tall that taking more decisions is create mitigate challenge in youngster lifestyle. Owing to, they make their own decisions Hence in the future is affected detrimental part of their respective lifestyle. Although, child make over-limitied to their option and were going in harmful part such as initiate to smoke and trying to drink alcohol therefore parents ought to giving less option to take on it. For example, In India majority of many parents they complete they child wishes withen few hours. In addition, young people demand rose dramatically when they giving more freedoms.

To conclude, youngster in this days have to enjoy but they do not have to take decisions by themself due to afftect seriously but some several things like buying cloths, trying to eat teasty food take their decisions. From my prespective, children in this modern world they have to initiate the decisions above the 18 year so they independence about their decisions but below the 18 years have to focus their goal to achive.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both views and state a position, especially in the conclusion, where you suggest that children should make some everyday choices but have greater independence after 18. However, the position is not consistently clear: the opening says you will discuss both sides, while the body does not clearly explain the first view that choice may encourage selfishness. The point that young people focus on their own wishes is asserted rather than explained, and the examples about London students and Indian parents are not clearly connected to the argument. The second view includes a relevant concern about smoking and alcohol, but the reasoning is difficult to follow. Develop each side with a clear claim, explanation and directly relevant example, and make your opinion explicit throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an introduction, separate body paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion, so the reader can identify its broad structure. You also use signposts such as “To commence,” “On the other hand,” and “To conclude.” However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear: the first body paragraph moves from shopping and food to communication skills and then to self-centred behaviour without showing how these points connect. Some linking phrases are inaccurate or awkward, including “Owing to” followed by a fragment and “Although” where the sentence does not complete a contrast. Referencing is also unclear in phrases such as “they complete they child wishes.” Organise each paragraph around one main idea and use simpler, accurate links between its explanation and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “freedom,” “communication skills,” “detrimental,” and “independence,” and you use some topic-specific examples. However, the range is limited by repeated general words such as “decisions,” “people,” and “youngster,” while frequent spelling and word-choice errors sometimes make meaning difficult to understand. Examples include “choies,” “cloths,” “iteams,” and “tarminate”; phrases such as “mitigate challenge” and “pacific healthy food” are also unclear or unnatural. Aim for accurate, natural collocations rather than inserting ambitious words that do not fit the meaning. Proofread spelling and learn useful topic phrases, such as “make informed choices” and “become self-centred,” then use them precisely.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and subordinate clauses, for example the sentence beginning “Although, child make over-limitied to their option,” but these attempts are often faulty and can obscure your meaning. There are frequent problems with sentence formation, verb forms, agreement, articles and plurals. For instance, “allowing youngster to make their own choices” lacks an appropriate plural or article, and “parents are allowing to their child” has an incorrect verb pattern. The opening also contains an incomplete sentence after “everyday of their life.” Punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, including unnecessary capitals in “Discuss” and “In London.” Practise accurate simple sentences first, then add controlled clauses using “because,” “although” and “which.”

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