Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It has been widely observed that decisions make a significant impact on individuals' life.Some people argue that having freedom in decison making makes the people more selfish;however, others assume it is quite esstional for the pupil to make their life effecting decisions.This essay will discuss both views;however, from my perspective, there is no harm if people make their decisions as it's their life and they know the better how their decisions would effect them in future.

One of the highlighted aspects of independant decision is making indiviuals wise and knowledgeable.It means that if children take a firm stand on something,it would help them to gain enough information and process it sharply.It is evident that the decisions not only make them feel more free but also create a great influence in their career. For instance, choosing a wrong interest would effect the future job opportunities.

On the other hand, people's prediction of negative effects of independant decision is also due to certain reasons. Children who used to decide about what to eat and how to dress become more stubborn, unlike to those who ask adults in it. Although this habbit makes that feel ignorant and rude, they find it hard to overcome this childhood habit. To illustrate, kids in their teens only focus on themselves, resulting in disrespecting their parents and teachers.

To sum up, there are always positive and negative aspects of phenomenon.Although being a self sufficient make children a bit self-centered,it can make them persistent in their decisions.No matter what, they get to know that their decisons would effect them by all means.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state a clear preference: children should be able to make decisions because they understand how those choices affect their lives. The discussion is relevant, and the example about choosing an interest connects decision-making with future opportunities. However, the argument is only partly developed. The positive side focuses mainly on independence and career effects, while the negative side makes a broad claim that children become stubborn and disrespectful without explaining when or why this happens. Your conclusion repeats the contrast but does not clarify how children’s freedom could be balanced with parental guidance. Develop each view with a more specific explanation or example, and make your final position more precise.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. Phrases such as “On the other hand” and “To sum up” help signal the direction of the discussion. The main progression is understandable, but some links are mechanical or unclear. In the introduction, “however” is used twice in close succession, and the relationship between the claim about independence and the example of choosing a wrong interest is not fully explained. In the final paragraph, the ideas about self-sufficiency, self-centredness, and persistence are placed together without showing how they relate. Use linking expressions more selectively and add clear explanatory links between claims and examples.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “independent decision,” “firm stand,” “career,” and “self-centered,” which helps convey the main ideas. However, spelling and word-choice errors are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause, as in “decison,” “esstional,” “independant,” and “habbit.” Some combinations are also unnatural or imprecise: “life effecting decisions,” “gain enough information,” and “people’s prediction of negative effects” do not express the intended ideas naturally. Aim for accurate, conventional collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms for autonomy, guidance, and self-interest would also help you explain the two positions with greater clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “if children take a firm stand on something” and a concession beginning “Although.” These attempts allow you to express reasons and contrasts. However, some sentence structures and punctuation are faulty. For example, “Although this habbit makes that feel ignorant and rude” has an unclear subject and pronoun, while “there are always positive and negative aspects of phenomenon” is missing an article. Several sentences also run words together after full stops, and semicolons are not consistently used correctly. Review articles, pronoun reference, and sentence boundaries, then proofread punctuation. More accurate control of these patterns would make your meaning easier to follow.

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