Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes.Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that effect them.Some people believe that Most children in every society choices for food entertainment and clothes is important thing for individuals because they independence every matter in life and live fredome ally.Social media is change the life individually in society because every person lives fredome, for example mobile phone change the attitude of people and to lives any children are believe that they do him.Children are tour the entertainment on social media and the effect attitude of him. some people believe that children is senserly for make decisions about matters in life and focus on goals and focus on education and other matters of life .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response recognises the topic and refers to both children making everyday choices and making decisions about matters affecting them. However, it does not clearly explain either view or give a definite opinion, and the discussion is largely unclear and underdeveloped. The point about social media changing people’s attitudes is only loosely connected to the question; the example does not show how children’s choices might foster selfishness or help them develop responsibility. The response also falls short of the required minimum: it contains 106 words, with 50 copied prompt words excluded. To improve, state your position directly, explain each side with relevant reasons, and support those reasons with specific examples before concluding.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 3.0

There is a basic attempt to address the two views, and the response moves from everyday choices to decisions affecting children. However, ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and there is little logical progression from one point to the next. The repeated opening, “Some people believe,” does not establish a clear contrast, while the social-media example is introduced without explaining how it supports the argument. Several sentences run together, including the opening, which makes the relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Organise the essay into an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. Use linking phrases such as “On the one hand” and “In contrast” to show how the points relate.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some topic-related vocabulary, including “choices,” “entertainment,” “independence,” “social media,” and “education,” so the reader can identify the general subject. However, the range is limited, and several word choices or forms make the intended meaning difficult to understand. For example, “live fredome ally” and “children are tour the entertainment” do not communicate a clear idea, while “the effect attitude of him” is not a natural expression. Spelling errors such as “fredome” also reduce clarity. Build a bank of accurate phrases for discussing autonomy and responsibility, and check that each word fits its context. For instance, use “make independent choices” and “influence children’s attitudes.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to form sentences and includes a few clauses linked by “because” and “for example.” However, grammatical control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence structure, agreement, and verb forms often make the meaning hard to follow. In “Most children in every society choices … is important thing,” the subject and verb do not agree, and the sentence lacks a clear grammatical structure. “Social media is change the life” also uses an incorrect verb form, while “children is …” shows an agreement error. Punctuation is weak: the opening sentences are joined without a space after the full stop, and the response lacks clear sentence boundaries. Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them using controlled subordinate clauses.

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