Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Some people agree that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainments) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only believe about their own wishes. While other people argue that is essential for children to make decisions about matters that effect them. In my opinion, although parents should guide their children for making suitable decisions for their development.

On one hand, if children make their own decisions, therefore it will have negative effect on children as well as on the society, because young generation mind is not well-developed and they can make wrong decisions for their future. For instance, if children have no idea about food, clothes and entertainment purposes, therefore he will eat unhealthy food, wear unsuitable clothes and for the entertainment he will choice wrong activities. However, children will spend more money and this will automatically affect other individuals living in the same society like not everyone can afford the same thing other can so parents should take care of it.

On the other hand, if parents guide their children in every field of life for the better future and for the better society. Because parents have more knowledge then their children. However, they should take decisions from their children and think about that decisions that its best for him and for the society are not. In addition, it will take the children to more and more development site in every field of life.

In conclusion, parents are responsible for their children better life style and they should guided their children in every field of life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both perspectives and give a view that parents should guide children, with relevant examples about food, clothing, entertainment, and spending. However, the discussion is brief and the position is not fully clear: the opening ends with an incomplete sentence (“although parents should guide…”), and the second body paragraph mainly argues for parental guidance rather than explaining the value of children making decisions. Several claims, such as children spending more money, need clearer explanation. The response also contains 234 words, so it is 16 words below the required minimum; this limits the space available to develop both views. Explain the benefits of age-appropriate choice and support your opinion with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs presenting contrasting sides, and a conclusion. This helps the reader identify the intended discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is often unclear, and linking words are sometimes inaccurate or repetitive. For example, “On one hand” is followed by “therefore” twice, while “However” introduces ideas that do not clearly contrast with the preceding point. The second body paragraph begins with a sentence fragment (“On the other hand, if parents guide…”), and the relationship between parental guidance and children’s own decisions is difficult to follow. Use one clear main idea per paragraph, connect each example directly to that idea, and choose linking expressions according to their meaning.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the general subject, including “decisions,” “society,” “development,” and “unhealthy food.” Some phrases also show an attempt to express more specific ideas, such as “young generation” and “suitable clothes.” However, the range is limited, and several inaccurate word choices or collocations make meaning less clear. For example, “only believe about their own wishes” does not express the intended idea naturally, and “development site” is unclear in context. There are also word-form and spelling problems, including “entertainments” and “effect” where the verb “affect” is needed. Build a more precise range for discussing independence, responsibility, and parental guidance, and check collocations and word forms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to use complex sentences with clauses beginning “if,” “because,” and “although,” and the reader can generally understand the main topic. However, the range is limited and these longer structures are often incomplete or inaccurately formed. The opening sentence beginning “While other people argue” is a fragment, as is “On the other hand, if parents guide their children…”. The final sentence also has an incorrect verb form in “they should guided.” Other recurring problems include missing or incorrect articles and agreement, as in “it will have negative effect” and “young generation mind.” These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise completing subordinate clauses and checking verb forms, articles, and singular/plural agreement.

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