Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some individuals argue that children having autonomy to decide on their daily issues has far reaching consequences such as a society full of selfish people later when they are grown up. However, other idividuals believe that it is crucial for them to be given a chance to decide on issues affecting them. Although autonomy of a child in making decision is necessary, such independence can lead to mislead choices such as unhealthy food, it also has benefits such as a society with individuals who can make better decisions in future such as when voting a bettter leader. I firmly believe that, children should be allowed to make decision, but be monitored by an adult.

On the one hand, autonomy of children in making decisions on matters affecting them is vital since it leads to raising better citizens who can make better and faster decisions later when they are grown-ups. Deciding is a virtue that should be natured at an early age. Therefore, children should be left alone in making some decision. Selecting a type of gameto play, for example, is a good way of trainning them to be independent thinkers. Additionally, also while chosing those to lead them in school prefect council they should be alowed to vote in their favorite candidates. Consequently, a nation will have better and decisive citizens later when they have finished school.

On the other hand, independence of children can lead to mislead choices from their peers. Since majority of them are innocent and might not be aware of consequences of some choices they make. Health matter, is a good example, children will always prefer consuming junk food, that are rich in sugar and salt. Such types of foods are believed to be the main cause of lifestyle diseases such as obesity that leads to cadiovascular ailments. Hence close monitor of the minors should be done by an adult for an healthy society.

In conclusion, despite independence of a child being important so as to raise children who can decide faster and well later in life, I firmly believe that, autonomy of a child can cause far reaching consequences such as unheathy society. Therefore, they should be monitored by grown-ups when doing so.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both views and state a clear position: children should make decisions, but with adult monitoring. The examples of choosing games and voting for school prefects support the benefits of decision-making, while the discussion of junk food and health explains the risks. This is relevant and gives the response a clear direction. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For instance, the link between school voting and becoming “better and decisive citizens” could be developed by explaining how practising choice builds responsibility or judgement. The opposing view is also mainly illustrated through food, so the discussion of everyday choices is somewhat narrow. Develop the reasoning behind each example and make the balance between freedom and guidance more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion that returns to your position. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” makes the progression easy to follow, and the examples generally appear in relevant places. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger organisation. However, cohesion is occasionally mechanical, and some links between ideas are unclear. For example, “Since majority of them are innocent…” is a sentence fragment rather than a complete explanation, while “Additionally, also” repeats the same linking function. Use fewer formulaic transitions and connect each example directly to the claim it supports; clearer referencing would also help the argument flow more naturally.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including terms such as “autonomy,” “independent thinkers,” “lifestyle diseases,” and “cardiovascular ailments.” These choices show an attempt to use more specific language, and the intended meaning is generally understandable. Some less common expressions are not used accurately or naturally, however: “mislead choices” does not express the intended idea, and “natured at an early age” is an awkward collocation. There are also spelling errors, including “idividuals,” “bettter,” and “cadiovascular,” which reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, natural combinations of words and proofread spelling. Replacing repeated general phrases such as “make better decisions” with context-specific wording would also add flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a concession in the introduction and clauses beginning with “since” and “although.” The main ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur and limit control. For example, “Although autonomy … is necessary, such independence can lead …, it also has benefits” joins contrasting clauses incorrectly; split this into two sentences or use a clearer conjunction. Other examples include “children having autonomy … has” (a subject–verb agreement problem), “Since majority of them…” (an incomplete sentence and missing article), and “for an healthy society” (article agreement). Review sentence boundaries, articles, and agreement, then check each long sentence for a clear grammatical structure.

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