Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

A number of people assume that permitting children to make independent decisions on everyday matters: such as diet, attire, and recreational activities is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people consider it crucial for youngsters to make decisions regarding matters that affect them. I totally support the point that children need their own choices and their decisions about situations that affect them.

Looking at the data in detail, In such cases many parents think that give freedom to their youngsters on many categories like food, clothes and entertainment can result in that persons in society that only think about their own and only considered themselves as a priority and forgot the rules and rights of other communities and societies because when we fulfilled all the extra or useless choices of our young people it would be result in self-centered persons. For instance, a recent incident at my school involved a student whose parents blamed his behavioral issues and disputes with neighbors on the unrestricted decision-making freedom they had granted him at home.

Other people considered that it is vital for young individuals to make decision-making freedom about any problems that interrupt them since when they do their work , study and sports etc. For example, In my childhood my caregivers gave me access to tv and outdoor sports whenever i want because of my hectic study routine. And this permit not only helped me to stay physically fit but also to enjoyed screen life in my childhood.

In conclusion, the number of individuals believe that giving permission to make their own routine everyday was not good . In contrast, others think that it is beneficial for youngsters.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both views and state your position clearly in the introduction: “I totally support” children having choices. The first body paragraph explains the concern that unrestricted freedom may encourage self-centred behaviour, and the school anecdote is relevant. The second gives a personal example of choosing television and sport. However, the discussion is only partly developed: the first example reports the parents’ explanation but does not show how the child’s choices caused the behaviour, while the second does not clearly explain how making decisions builds responsibility or benefits children more broadly. The conclusion summarises the two positions but does not restate your own view. Develop the reasoning behind each example and make your final position explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the paragraphs broadly correspond to the two views. Examples also help readers follow the main points. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to track. The opening of the first body paragraph, “Looking at the data in detail,” does not fit an essay based on general reasoning and personal examples, and the long sentence that follows combines several claims without clear steps. Connections between ideas are often mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “For instance” and “For example.” The conclusion introduces no clear synthesis or personal stance. Use a clearer topic sentence for each view, divide complex explanations into shorter units, and link each example directly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “independent decisions,” “self-centered,” “behavioral issues,” and “physically fit,” so the main subject is generally clear. There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “matters that affect them.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, which sometimes makes the meaning harder to follow: “give freedom … on many categories,” “make decision-making freedom,” and “enjoyed screen life” are examples. Some expressions are also imprecise, such as “other communities and societies” in this context. Aim for natural combinations such as “give children freedom to choose,” “make decisions about issues that affect them,” and “spend time watching television.” Check word forms and capitalization as well.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a conditional explanation beginning “when we fulfilled…” and clauses introduced by “since.” This shows an effort to express cause and contrast, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors recur across the response. For example, “many parents think that give freedom” needs a subject and a correctly formed verb, while “it would be result” has an incorrect verb construction. In “this permit not only helped me … but also to enjoyed,” the verb forms are not parallel. There are also agreement and tense problems, such as “Other people considered,” alongside inconsistent capitalization after full stops. Build accuracy with shorter sentences first, then check subject–verb agreement, verb forms, articles, and punctuation in longer structures.

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