Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Recent IELTS Exams (Canada & India) · 2026-08-23

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently helped your company organise an event at a hotel. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter:

– Provide details about the event
– Mention what you particularly liked about the hotel
– Suggest areas for improvement.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir / Madam,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear Hotel Manager,

I am writing this letter to inform you about a charity event that is held by local council members on saturday evening at 5 pm.

I would like to describe the best part of the event was collection of funds for the charity organisation that helps the children suffering from end terminal diseases like leukemia, cancers and thalessemia, most of the children are at the last stage of their life and might not b able to see their next birthday. I was the main account holder there, collecting money and providing receipt to the donors. we collected huge amount which we can spend for the treatment of these poor children.

The hotel staff was extremely polite and nice. Although they provided food to all the participants free of cost, but unfortunately quality of food was poor, I was feeling very ashamed when most council members were pointing out this concern.

It is a humble request please advise the hotel cooking staff not to serve this kind of food in future events, I hope you will take action to improve the quality.

Sincerely,

Iram Shahnaz

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

You have addressed all three bullet points: providing details about the event, mentioning positive aspects of the hotel, and suggesting improvements. However, the development of these points is somewhat uneven. The description of the event focuses heavily on the charity's nature rather than the logistics of the event you helped organize at the hotel. Additionally, the tone is slightly inconsistent; while it is a formal letter, the inclusion of overly emotional details about the children's health is less relevant to a business communication with a hotel manager. To improve, ensure your ideas remain focused on the professional context of the event management task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your points. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical. For example, the transition 'Although they provided food... but unfortunately' is grammatically incorrect because 'although' and 'but' should not be used together in this way. Additionally, the flow between sentences could be smoother; some sentences feel like a list of facts rather than a cohesive narrative. Using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in addition') would help improve the logical progression of your ideas.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You have a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey your message, such as 'charity organisation', 'donors', and 'participants'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and spelling, such as 'thalessemia' (thalassemia) and 'end terminal diseases' (terminal illnesses). The phrase 'last stage of their life' is a bit informal for this context. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise professional terminology and ensure correct spelling of medical or technical terms. Your vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent errors that occasionally distract the reader. For instance, 'I am writing this letter to inform you about a charity event that is held' should be 'was held' to reflect the past tense. There are also punctuation and capitalization errors, such as 'saturday' and 'we collected'. The sentence 'I was feeling very ashamed when most council members were pointing out this concern' is slightly awkward; 'I felt embarrassed when...' would be more natural. Focus on consistent tense usage and proofreading for basic grammatical slips.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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