Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Recent IELTS Exams (Canada & India) · 2026-08-25

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You recently helped your company organise an event at a hotel. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter:

– Provide details about the event
– Mention what you particularly liked about the hotel
– Suggest areas for improvement.

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:
Dear Sir / Madam,

Student answer (Band 4.0)

TO RESOECTED MANAGER

I AM A JHOON.I AM INFORMING TO YOU ABOUT OUR NEW EVENT IN TAJ HOTEL NEAR TO ABOURSFORT.WE HAVE TOO MUCH THING OF OUR PRODUCT ADVERTISEMENT LIKE IN NEWS PAPER MAGAGINE OTHER SOURCES ALSO.BUT THIS EVENT IS FOR ONLINE MARKETING AND PLACING OF ONLINE BUSSINESS.I THOUGHT WE HAVE PARTICIPATE IN THIS EVENT FOR OUR NRE PLATFORM.SUCH AS A NEW AREAS IN OUR TOWN TO SUPPORT THE BUSINESS LIKE WILLOWBROOK ,SURREY CENTREAL, AND NEAR THE AREA OF OUR BUSINESS THAT ONE IS GOOD FOR US.SO I REQUEST TO YOU ALLOW TO THE EVENT AMD MUST BE PARTICIPATE IN THIS FIRM.THIS ONE IS GOOD AND MOST PORPAR ITEM AND TIME OF GROWING OUR BUSINESS IN THE MARKET FIRM.WE HVAE ACHIEVE A NEW IDEA OF ONLINE MARKETING.WE WILL MAEET A NEW PEOPLE AND DISUCCSE THE NEW TOPIC OF OUR NEW MARKETING ARES AND PLACES.

THANKIKNG TO YOU.

YOUR TRUSTABLE EMPOLYEE

JOHN.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response addresses the three bullet points, but the content is often unclear and lacks the professional tone required for a formal letter. While you mention the event, the details regarding the nature of the event and the specific hotel are vague and difficult to follow. The suggestions for improvement are missing entirely; instead, the text focuses on marketing strategies. To improve, ensure you clearly state what you liked about the hotel (e.g., the staff or facilities) and provide concrete, actionable suggestions for improvement, such as better catering or more efficient check-in processes. The tone should be formal and polite throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The letter lacks logical organization and paragraphing. The ideas are presented in a stream-of-consciousness style, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of your argument. There is a lack of cohesive devices (such as 'furthermore', 'however', or 'consequently') to link sentences and ideas together. The structure is essentially one long block of text, which does not meet the requirements for a formal letter. Using clear paragraph breaks for each bullet point would significantly improve the readability and logical flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary is very limited and repetitive. There are frequent errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'RESOECTED', 'JHOON', 'BUSSINESS', and 'PORPAR'. These errors occasionally impede communication, making it hard to understand your exact meaning. You rely on basic, informal language that is not suitable for a business context. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning standard business terminology and proofreading your work to correct basic spelling mistakes. Expanding your vocabulary to include more precise nouns and adjectives will help you express your ideas more effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammar is highly problematic, with frequent errors in sentence structure, punctuation, and capitalization. Many sentences are fragmented or lack proper subject-verb agreement, such as 'I AM A JHOON' and 'WE HVAE ACHIEVE A NEW IDEA'. The use of all-caps is inappropriate for a formal letter. The range of structures is very limited, consisting mostly of simple, error-prone sentences. To improve, you need to focus on basic sentence construction, correct verb tenses, and standard punctuation. Practicing the difference between simple and complex sentences will also help you demonstrate a wider grammatical range.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.